Wednesday, December 1, 2010

"Sweet on You"

by Charlotte More from the November 15, 2010 issue

Tagline: Molly's chocolate shop kept her busy, but not so busy that she'd stopped hoping for Mr. Right...

In A Nutshell: Chocolate shop owner Molly falls for her regular customer, a man who faithfully buys candy for his grandma every Friday afternoon. One day he buys a special box of expensive truffles and has them gift wrapped. Molly assumes he's got a new girlfriend. Turns out he surprises her outside the shop after she closes, gives her the truffles, and asks her out for dinner.

Teaching Points: This is a (pun intended) sweet story and pretty formulaic, which is not necessarily a bad thing, seeing as how the editors liked it enough to publish it.

Girl meets Boy. Girl assumes he has a girlfriend. Girl is proved wrong--she's the girl he wants.

The trick with writing these stories is figuring out

1) ...what the Boy does to make the Girl think he's attached. Often it's him getting or picking out a gift. Sometimes the Girl sees him from a distance with another girl.

2a) ...who the gift is really for. Usually it's a female relative. Could be a co-worker who is sick or something. OR

2b) ...why he was with that woman. Often it's work related, but it doesn't have to be. Any innocent, plausible reason will do.

3) the Boy reveals that he is really interested in the Girl.

Also, you'll notice that More foreshadows The Gift in the beginning of the story... Molly comments that the special truffles are her favorite. That way, at the end when Seth gives her the box of special truffles, he is shown to be thoughtful and observant, and Molly is touched.

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