The Fast Track to Love

by Sue Alcon O'Connor from the August 4, 2025 issue

Tagline: When Jenna attends a local dog race with her pup, she's charmed by the town's festivities and its handsome dog-loving sheriff.

Observations: There is so much witty dialogue in this story. It kept me smiling throughout the story.

"Pickle, we're in the land of your people now." -- LMAO.

"This is Beans. He's supposed to be in race six, not conducting a surprise meet and greet."

"...this is Pickle. He's retired from everything but naps and treats."

"I moved here for a new job, peace, quiet--and apparently weenie dog stampedes."

"Welcome to Patton...where the dogs run faster than the Wi-Fi."

"Want to take these two lawbreakers out for a celebratory pup cup?"

I also think the premise--a dachshund race is fabulous. 

Photo by RavenU via Flickr CC License

A Summer to Remember

by P.S. Murray from the July 21, 2025 issue

Tagline: When Bobbie realizes her odler brother's best friend, Chance, is joining her family for a day of fun in the sun, she never expects to stumble on the possibility of new love.

Stream of Consciousness Observations: The opening paragraph sets the scene well for a summer day in the sun.

Ah, an irritating older brother. I always wanted an older brother but I can imagine they could be annoying, so maybe it's better not to have had one. LOL

This isn't a huge deal but I'll just point out that you don't need to tag every line of dialogue in a story, especially if the conversation is between two people. Readers can easily keep track of a couple of back and forths without you having to designate who is talking.

I'm not sure how old the heroine is yet and I'm halfway through the story. Again, not a big deal, but it's good to ground your readers so they're not wondering. I'm also wondering what time of day it is. I'd assumed it was mid-morningish, but they play one game of volleyball and then they're having steaks, so, maybe nail down some setting/character details sooner rather than later.

Edited: A loyal subscriber pointed out to me that the dad called them to lunch, so my bad for not reading more carefully!

Okay, the brother is forgiven because he secured her a seat next to her crush!

He stayed all day before saying he needed to leave as he had to attend an early meeting the following morning. -- So I guess they were eating lunch after all. After going back and rereading, I see that they may not have been having steaks. It was just mentioned that "No one grilled a steak like her dad," which implied that steak was on the menu. Maybe it's just me. Let me know in the comments.

Photo by Thomas Kohler via Flickr CC License

On the Trail of New Love

by Sandra Smith from the July 14, 2025 issue

Tagline: When Abby finds herself struggling during a hike, her handsome coworker Tanner shows up to help--and before long, sparks fly.

Off the Cuff Observations: Well, a hearty congratulations to Ms. Sandy Smith, my most loyal blog subscriber, bar none. Sandy comments on every blog post and I appreciate it so much. Blogging often feels like shouting into the void. It feels like no one is reading what you're writing and you think, "What's the point?" But Sandy is always there with a comment, bless her heart.

And now she's published! I'm so excited to read her story, so let's dive in.

Ooh, we're starting with a woman in distress! 

Wiping her face with a towel, she glared at the path leading to the mountain ahead. Okay, maybe it was only a hill, but it was a very steep one. -- LOL I like Abby.

Okay, she's not on a "regular" hike with people. It's a team-building thing. This is subtle, but it's definitely a pro-move that Sandy chose to slip this info into the story here rather than put it in paragraph two as exposition. This way you jump right into the action and get the reader hooked rather than "bore" them right away with backstory. In storytelling, this is known as in media res. 

Abby took a deep breath. Mara was right. Time to stop being a wet blanket. She couldn't let the team down. -- As I've said before on the blog, it's important to make your main characters Good People and here we see Abby moving past her personal dislike of the situation and thinking of someone other than herself. Personally, I feel five miles is kind of excessive for office people to bond over, especially including steep hills, and especially for a woman with asthma, but Abby seems to be a bigger person than me. LOL

 ...a blue T-shirt stretched taut over muscled arms. -- Tanner is certainly a breath of fresh air!

Aha! Tanner, who apparently is in charge, didn't know she was asthmatic. He's forgiven.

I think I am the search party. -- LOL

Where would you be if your job hadn't made you climb a hill? -- Again, LOL! As I point out in my Deep Dive class, humor is optional for Woman's World stories, but always welcome, especially in the form of witty banter.

Okay, they're talking as they're hiking, and as a fellow out-of-shape person, I can tell you Abby would probably have had some trouble, especially with her condition, but I can easily suspend my disbelief briefly here.

A cool mist sprayed across Abby's face as the rush of the waterfall met her ears. -- Nice description! It's only one sentence but it definitely sets the scene well for us. Note the sound detail. Don't forget to include more senses than just sight when you're describing a setting.

All right, I can see why the editors chose this story. It's a good one! I hope it's the first of many we'll see published by Sandy. She is the personification of persistence paying off.

Photo by Narcah via Flickr CC License

Sweet, Just Like Honey

by Stacey Weeks from the June 30, 2025 issue

Tagline: When a writer travels to interview a handsome beekeeper on his farm, she never expects to stumble upon romance.

Stream of Consciousness Observations: Wow. This issue must have been buried underneath some other ones. Sorry for the delay on this one. This will be a quick and dirty analysis.

I love bees! I even visited an apiary on the big island of Hawaii earlier this year. It was amazing. We got to put on the gear and hold one of the racks of honeycomb, with the bees still crawling on it! But I digress. 

"Her experience with the insect was more panic-at-the-picnic rather than admire-in-a-meadow." -- Love that!

Oh, she's a reporter and she reads romance. I like her already.

We get a very nice description of the hero--something I tell my students that they needn't necessarily do. If the choice is between establishing a connection between the hero and heroine or physically describing a character, go for the latter every time.

LOL. Ms.Weeks is really rolling with the romance novel theme. Love it.

Okay even more physical description of him. A quick glance...about 80 words dedicated to describing Adam. Ms. Weeks clearly thought it was important to really paint a thorough picture of Adam.

So, I figured this was just going to be a couple of hours of interviewing, but it looks like it's a few days, which is good for the romance!

"tiny wiggle dance." -- Yes! I love seeing the bees do that.

"When she took the assignment, Erin hadn't expected depth or humor..." -- Well, to be frank, I haven't seen him be humorous yet, but that's a very small complaint.

Okay, there's the humor in in the fourth and fifth to last paragraphs. :) 

Oh, I love the ending!

Great story. Gave me lazy summer, golden light, yummy handsome guy with eye crinkles. 

Photo by Brian Jeffery Beggerly via Flickr CC License