Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Catch a Falling Star

by Dana Stephens from the June 27, 2011 issue

Tagline: Jenny didn't realize it at first, but her wish had come true before she even spotted a falling star.

In a Nutshell: Jenny goes to the lake with her sister and brother-in-law. After an encounter with several yellow jackets, she takes an unexpected spill into the lake. Jack "rescues" her. To thank him, she invites him to dinner, and when she wishes on a falling star, one year later her wish comes true at her wedding to Jack.

Observations: Jenny leaned over the front seat of the Jeep. "Annie," she said to her sister, "are you feeling okay?"

"You and Jack," Annie said, elbowing her husband sitting in the driver's seat, "are like two worrywarts. The baby isn't due for another month--I'm fine, really."

I got off to a rocky start with this story. It might just be me, but I had trouble figuring out if Jack was Annie or Jenny's husband. I read it just now and could see that he was Annie's, but I can easily switch mindsets and get confused again, thinking he could be Jenny's. The pronoun "her" is a tad bit ambiguous, and the names are similar--two syllables with n's and a long e at the end... :)

Also, I wondered in the back of my mind about how smart it was to go somewhere remote if Annie's only a month away from delivery. However, I'm very detail oriented and most readers probably wouldn't think like I do.

However, I did like the yellow-jacket idea and the man to the rescue plot, and Dylan's joke really made me laugh. They're talking about fishing in the lake...

"Are they biting? We brought a couple of rods." That's Jenny talking.

"The only thing I've pulled out of the water so far is you," he said, his blue eyes twinkling.


Interesting twist in this story in that the circularity/motif thingy I'm always talking about was "out of order" in that the first mention of the wishing on a star was in the second to last paragraph instead of near the beginning of the story. Also, we see that they get married, which is always nice, but hard to do in these short stories.

Lastly, I noticed Jenny being proactive in that she searches for a falling star to wish on. Smart girl! Give Fate a nudge when necessary. :)

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