Friday, August 24, 2012

The Candy Lady

by Jan Bono from the August 20, 2012 issue

Tagline: Mitchell had a crush on the pretty young woman in the candy store. He never suspected he was sweet on him too!

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In a Nutshell: Mitchell likes the girl who sold him fudge, but he can't figure out how to approach her without appearing creepy. Luckily, she's a forthright woman and makes the first move herself.

Observations: Woman's World stories are heartwarming often because the protagonists are uncertain, like most of us. We see their doubts and fears and identify with them because of them. Mitchell is a good example of this. He seems like a real person. I think that's a goal when creating characters for a Woman's World story--make them real, not realistic.

Unfortunately, I found him a little milk toast. AFter reading the story, I didn't quite buy that he "was afraid asking for [her phone number] would seem presumptuous. Creepy even." I think he was just plain afraid, because later when he sees her again...

Mitchell smiled back, suddenly feeling at a loss for words.

I would like to have seen him develop a little gumption by this time in the story.

My Favorite Part: I enjoyed Amy. She was spunky and cute, as we see here.

       "Did you eat that whole pound of fudge already?" she asked, [sic] with a teasing tone.
     "Good!" she said. "That means you came back just to see me."

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