Tagline: When Sherri showed up at her friend's Super Bowl party, she was dreading the though tof having to watch football. Until she hit it off with a handsome stranger by the snack table.
Observations: I really identified with this story, being a non-football fan myself. When I go to Super Bowl parties, which is rarely, I'm only there for the food. LOL
I liked the nod to the national anthem. I am a proud American and I always sing it at live events. I wish more people would. It's exhilarating to sing with a big group of people.
I laughed when she admitted she tried the guacamole when she made it and my mouth watered when I read about the smoked chicken wings. YUM. As much as I don't like football, I love chicken wings.
It was fun to belatedly realize that this was a matchmaker story, too! I didn't see that coming, but it was a welcome surprise. I really liked the last line too.
Paige looked over her shoulder, seeing this romance unfold, and congratulated herself on a successful strategic offensive play.
And it's a funny coincidence that this is the second story in a row to feature Swedish meatballs!
So, as a bit of a teaching moment, when writing a matchmaker story, you don't have to identify that trope and/or the matchmaker him/herself right off the bat. You can keep that card close to your vest until later as a fun surprise.
Photo by Jeremy Keith via Flickr CC License
7 comments:
This was a good story and especially interesting for me to read as I sent in a similar themed Super Bowl story last year about a couple not particularly interested in football. So I read it in comparison to mine to see how this one apparently worked better!
That's a good idea, Sandy! Turn the rejection into an opportunity to learn!
Not a football fan, but I am a foodie so this story was quite enjoyable to me. Loved the interaction between the couple and comments on the food types, etc.
Thank you, Kate, for the positive review of my story. I appreciate the time and effort you put into sharing your feedback! Thank you also for your helpful website/blog. It’s such a valuable service you provide to fellow authors.
P.S. I love chicken wings as well, so the story was a teeny bit autobiographical. LOL
Thank you Sandy, and interesting that you wrote a similarly themed story. (Great minds. ;)
Same happened to me with snow-skiing themed story I submitted but did not get published. A few weeks later a different author’s snow-skiing story was published. It was interesting to read a different take on a similar scenario.
Thank you for your kind words about my story!
Pat, above comment is from me. Still trying to get the hang of this site. Not sure why my google profile won’t come up…? 🧐
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