A Sweet Change of Season

by Marcie McEachern from the September 7, 2026 issue

Tagline

When Emily arrives at her family's lake house, an unexpected reunion with her older brother's best friend reminds her hat some feelings never fade.

Observations

After reading this story, several things popped out at me. One, if you were to make a checklist of things you might want in every story, a good simile should be on it. Marcie had two.

...it sent her pulse skipping like a stone across the water.

...the lake glittered like a sea of sapphires.

I would also include mentioning at least one smell and one sound. In this story, we got a whiff of citrus and sandalwood when Corbin hugged Tiffany. We heard the rustle of leaves and the crunch of her shoes on the gravel and also the lap of the lake water. Readers might not consciously notice things like this, but it does register and make your descriptions richer.

Two, look at this sentence.

A hope that had no business being so buoyant bobbed to the surface inside her chest.

This reinforces the fact that the story takes place on a lake. You can do this with every story. If your story is about a mechanic, include some sort of reference to cars. If it takes place in a bakery, compare someone's feelings to warmth or spice. I mean, you get the idea.

Three, I always love not seeing the cliche of electricity in a Woman's World story. If you just give it a little time, I know you can come up with some other indication of physical sensation/attraction, like this one:

His hand covered hers, sending a pleasant vibration humming up her arm.

And finally, notice the bookending. At the beginning of the story, we have this:

This quick getaway was just what she needed: one last summery hurrah before the seasons changed.

And at the end:

The leaves had yet to change, but a new season had just begun. A new season for her and Corbin...together.

Bookending is a great way to bring a story full circle.

Thanks, Marcie, for a story filled with so many teaching moments!

Photo by Virginia State Parks via Flickr CC license