Thursday, August 5, 2010

Sarah's Smile

by Diane Burch from the July 12, 2010 issue

Tagline: Trace was shopping for white clover honey, but when he got to the market, he found something even sweeter...

In a Nutshell: Trace Harmon is determined to ask out the girl at the farmer's market. He strikes out time after time, getting interrupted. When he finally gives up after finding out that the girl was only summer help, she shows up on his doorstep to deliver honey. Turns out her grandfather runs the market.

Observations: This was a little unusual in that it begins with the hero already having met the heroine. But I was slightly confused as to the timeline. I coudl not figure out just how many times Trace went to the market.

First paragraph, he's introducing himself with a handshake. :

"Trace Harmon." Thirty and gun-shy after a bad break-up six months prior, he offered his hand to the pretty young woman at the counter in the busy open-air market.

Then, in his thoughts he's recalling the week BEFORE when he gone shopping for clover honey. There's a short scene where he gets the honey. I believe this scene is the FIRST meet. They get interrupted by a pushy customer.

Then, at the bottom of the first column, it says,

All week, the girl with the red hair occupied his mind--only now she had a name. So, the next Saturday he headed for the farm market again.

I think that refers to the SECOND meet, which brings us right back to where we started in that very first paragraph where he introduces himself with the handshake. Right? Wrong. Because here's what happens:

Trace walked over to where she was stacking heads of lettuce. "Hi," he said.

Sarah smiled. "Hi, Trace."

She remembered his name. That was a good sign.

So, when did he give her his name? That very first paragraph, right? Was that first paragraph the first meeting or the second meeting? I hope one of you can explain it to me.

Even with my confusion as to all of Trace's comings and goings, it was a cute story. I did think he was a little lame for not just hanging around until there was a lull, but I gave him points for persistence. It was cute how he got tongue-tied around her, and the ending was sweet.

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