Thursday, October 3, 2013

The Handsome Helper

by Tina Radcliffe from the October 7, 2013 issue

Tagline: Annie ran into Patrick, and it turned out to be the first day of their life together

In A Nutshell:

Observations: I'm going to do a stream-of-consciousness critique today where I just type what I'm thinking as I read the story.

Hm. She literally runs into him. Seems a bit cliche, but I'm willing to see if the author makes me forget about that.

I like the phrase "hard wall of man." Of course, what red-blooded woman wouldn't? LOL

I like his name, Patrick Murphy. Hers...she has two first names. :/

He is helpful and very nice.

I wonder at Annie's business acumen. She's got her grand opening on Saturday and she's just now thinking about hiring some extra help? Hm. And obviously, Patrick won't be sending anyone over to help her out. He's going to go himself. And maybe ask for a maple bar in payment.

Oh, there, she out and out offers him one. LOL

And here's Annie chiding herself for not getting help ahead of time. Yeah. What were you thinking, chickie?

Aha! I was right. Patrick shows up as the helper, but I wonder why he was late. I'm suspecting it's so the author could build the tension.

I like him flipping the sign on the door.

All in all, it was a so-so story. I liked Radcliffe's "A Match Made In Winter" much better.

Photo by HeatherHeatherHeather (cc)


Rosemary Gemmell said...

Fascinating and helpful to read your thoughts on it like that, Kate!

Chris said...

I enjoyed this one a lot. A hard wall of man and donuts, that'll do nicely, thank you. I also liked the flipping of the door sign - masculine authority with a hint of promise. I found Annie's slightly ditzy personality appealing and I could understand how she was so flustered with everything she still had to do that the idea of an assistant had slipped her mind. My only criticism was the slightly lame closing line, but it's a small negative in an otherwise good story.

Elaine. said...

I enjoyed reading the story. I liked the hard wall of man, then his help at the store (since I always look for help at those stores, lol) and the way he comes in and ask for an apron. Saving the box was nice. Also like reading your thoughts as you read the story Kate, thinking I should write mine down as I read the stories . Elaine

Pat said...

I loved this story. You have to lave a man who's cares enough to help and know when help in needed. Great characters.

Pat said...

Oops! lave should be love. Hit the wrong key.