Friday, December 27, 2013
A White Christmas
Tagline: What Ella expected to be the worst Christmas seemed about to turn into one of the best!
In a Nutshell: Divorced, Ella is sad because her daughter is spending Christmas with her dad. Her sadness is observed by a handsome co-worker who asks her out for a latte at the end of the busy day.
Observations: I have goosebumps on my arms. Maybe it's the magic of a Christmas story and the hope that shines at the end of the tale. Whatever it was, I loved this story.
Sometimes, you have to go back to the basics in which we have a protagonist with a problem and we see her solve it by the end and grow a little in the process. In this case, I think Ella's problem is that she's sad and lonely. While we see the man come to her rescue, sort of, I think it's balanced by her not brooding after her daughter calls her midday. She also doesn't stand mutely in the elevator at the end of the day. She speaks first, a small but important detail.
Usually I caution writers to be frugal with description, merely because we are only given 800 words with which to work. However, did you notice that long paragraph describing the night at the end of the story? Wow. It was absolutely necessary and added so much. It almost felt as if I was inside a snow globe. It allowed the reader to pause and reflect and let the attraction build between the hero and heroine until they pushed open the doors and started down the path to romance.
Photo by insidious_plots (cc)