All Fired Up

by Shelley Cooper from the October 4, 2021 issue

Tagline: When Samantha meets an unwitting carjacker rustling around in her back seat at the grocery store, she never expects that, to atone for his "crime," he will make her the best meal of her life...and cook up a steamy new chance at love.

Observations: Well, I'm not sure how this issue got buried, but better late than never.

I have been the perpetrator of this particular crime! Many years ago, I had arrived at my car and was confused as to why my key wouldn't unlock it. This was way back when you actually inserted the key into the lock. LOL I realized it was not my car, just a lookalike, when I noticed someone sitting in it!! I was so embarrassed! What are the chances that two twin cars would be parked on the same residential street?

I talk all the time about showing the hero and heroine connecting. It's a critical element that you cannot skimp on in a Woman's World romance. In this story after the meet cute, Cooper shows them sharing bits of her personal lives with each other. In addition, these are humorous, self-deprecating stories, which also show the reader that these two don't take themselves too seriously. 

Photo by Bradley Gordon via Flickr Creative Commons License

Love Under the Stars

by Marti Attoun from the September 27, 2021 issue

Tagline: On a visit to her town's drive-in theater, Connie's memories of her old love are made new again when she runs into her high school sweetheart.

Stream of Consciousness Observations: 

• I love the name Junie. It reminds me of the children's book series, Junie B. Jones.
• Ah, a drive-in theatre. We're jumping right in with a big dose of nostalgia! I remember going to the drive-in with my parents. My sister and I would wear our pajamas and always fell asleep shortly after the movie started. The jammies was a genius idea by my mom and dad, for obvious reasons.
• Five bucks for a carload? That seems very low.
• "Cotton-candy Connie?" HILARIOUS
• More hilarity: "Nope. You can't fire someone when you're laughing."
• I kind of wish I knew how old Junie was. I'm trying to figure out just how precocious she is.
• No one sat outside their cars when I went to the drive-in. And blankets? Maybe drive-ins in other parts of the country are on grass fields. The ones I went to in Los Angeles were all asphalt. This doesn't surprise me; the LA River is all concrete.
• 50-cent burgers... Again, are the brothers Greenwood trying to make a profit or is this like a town-building venture?
• I do love the name of the drive-in though. The Starlight Drive-In. I can almost picture the mid-century modern sign. Edited to add - Look, I did find a photo of a mid-century modern sign of a Starlight drive-in. What are the chances???
• Perfect ending with the perfect amount of warmth and possibility.

Photo by Patrick Feller via Flickr Creative Commons License

Ingredients for Love

by Lisa Weaver from the October 11, 2021 issue

Tagline: Tasked with uncovering the secret to her handsome neighbor's prize-winning chili, Emma finds herself in a steamy romance.

Stream of Consciousness Observations:

• Aha. It's a matchmaker story. 
• "You want me to do what?" -- Immediately, I'm curious what her grandmother asked her to do and I want to read on to find out.
• "I'm not asking you to steal Anthony's recipe. I just need you to gather...intel." -- LMAO. Grandma is a hoot.
• "Anthony Figoli was a hot pepper away from beating me last year at the Great Chili Cookoff." -- Again, Grandma is slaying me.
• Who doesn't love a firefighter?
• Oh, it's the grandpa's recipe. I sense a secondary romance in the works.
• Ha! I was right. Grandma has a crush on the recipe owner.
• I love being surprised and I wasn't expecting for the grandfather to be wanting Granny's chili secret. Nice!
• "If she's as lovely as you are..." Okay, just how old is this firefighter? I don't see anyone under the age of 60 or 70 using the word lovely to describe a woman.
• Cute ending! He tells her the secret is a pinch of sugar. I actually add pinches of sugar to a few of my recipes. :)

Photo by Jake Przesbo via Flickr Creative Commons License

In the Market for True Love

by Alyssa Symon from the September 20, 2021 issue

Tagline: When fellow farmer and foe Eddie winks at her across the stall at the farmers market, Kathleen senses something new growing between them.

Observations: This story used a trope that I remember Alex Pollock saying she wanted to see more of...enemies to lovers. The key to this type of story is to move from the character "hating" the other person to deciding they might be a potential mate. It's hard to do in 800 words but obviously possible.

First you establish the reason for the animosity. In this story, Kathleen and Eddie had rival farmers market businesses. But as the story progresses, we see her feelings going back and forth, moving from negative to positive. Here's a breakdown:

• Negative: She notices the crowd across the way at Eddie's stall and hopes his squash are underripe.
• Negative: "...as much as Kathleen loathed the way his business took away from hers..."
• Positive: "...she couldn't help but admire the view [of his body.]"
• Positive: "He had that intoxicating smell she adored, the earthy aroma one acquired form picking beans and digging up tubers."
• Positive: Flustered, she flushes when he winks at her.
• Positive: She giggles when he suggests their situations will reverse next Saturday.
• Positive: Her heartbeat quickens when Eddie rubs a smudge off her face. 
• Positive: She gets butterflies due to his proximity.
• Positive: She accepts is dinner invitation.

Interesting to see there wasn't really too much negative, right? So, to write an enemies to lovers story, start out with the reason for the animosity and spend the rest of the time showing the feelings change over time. In this story, only a day passed, but you could easily make the story cover a longer span of time.

Photo by Gemma Billings via Flickr Creative Commons License

The Sweetest Love of All

 by Marcella Robinson from the September 13, 2021 issue

Tagline: After swooning over ice-cream stand owner Rich all summer, Ellie is sure it will come to nothing...until one fateful cone changes everything.

Observations: In my class, How to Write and Sell Romance to Woman's World Magazine, I give you a bunch of ideas on how to keep your story to 800 words. One of those ideas is to keep physical description of characters to a minimum, but this story had an unusual amount of description--of Ellie, of Rich and of the park itself. (I enjoyed reading those details and the lovely feelings the park description evoked.)

You never want to sacrifice character interaction/connection for the sake of character physical description. It's much more important to show your characters talking, laughing, sharing ice cream, sharing stories, etc. than it is to tell the reader they both have brown hair. However, I didn't see any sacrifices made in this story. There is still plenty of on-the-page interaction. We see them connecting in so many ways...

• the smiles exchanged
• the inside joke about him eating his profits
• the date they make to meet in a week
• his thoughtful observation that she liked sprinkles
• their conversation about their respective businesses
• finally, their hands touching

This last thing--Ellie putting her hand in his--let's look at this more closely. There are 11 stages of physical intimacy. Stage four is hand to hand/arm. Four! (Stage 1 - Eye to body, Stage 2 - Eye to eye, Stage 3 - Voice to voice.) In this excellent article on the subject, they say:

The first three stages could happen quickly, but you don’t want to immediately rush into touching a stranger’s arm, or hand.

You’ll need to continue the conversation, take the time to get to know each other and build up your connection and friendship before you start touching.

Rushing through the steps of physical intimacy can be creepy--in real life and in fiction. Make sure your characters have conversed, gotten to know each other and built up their connection and friendship before they start touching. I'm not talking about catching someone to prevent them from falling, accidentally reaching for the same head of lettuce and that type of thing. I'm talking about intentional touching. Don't rush it or you risk making the reader (or editor) feel uncomfortable.

Photo by Elsie Hui via Flickr Creative Commons License

Love on Labor Day

by Mishael Austin Witty from the September 6, 2021 issue

Tagline: When a dashing captain saves the day at her company's holiday boat party, Becca finds that a new chance at love is on the horizon.

Observations: This was a classic misunderstanding story--Becca meets the captain of the boat and has no idea he's actually the owner of the company she works for. 

Notice how Jack intervened when Becca's little boy was getting out of hand. It's critical to show the hero and heroine connecting somehow, and if the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, then the way to a woman's heart just might be through her child. LOL 

Overall, cute story, but here comes a purely personal opinion that you are more than welcome to disagree with. In the past few years, sexual harassment has been prevalent in the news, so I might refrain from a boss/employee story just because of that. No doubt, real life boss and employee relationships can turn out to be happily-ever-after ones, and no doubt Woman's World readers (and the editors, for that matter) are well aware that dating your boss might not be the wisest idea. But even so, I would steer clear of this kind of story, especially if you're a new writer who hasn't sold to them yet. You might have better odds choosing a plot that isn't (potentially) controversial. :)

Photo by BluEyedA73 via Flickr Creative Commons License

Hand-painted Romance

by Wendel Potter from the August 30, 2021 issue

Tagline: As a recent widow, Desi finds her only solace painting pottery for her store...until handsome Sam arrives to fill her world with the color of love.

Stream of Consciousness Observations: For those of you who are new to my blog, sometimes instead of reading and then analyzing the story, I just type my reactions to the story as I read. To be honest, I often do this when I have several stories sitting in a pile and need to catch up. LOL However, never fear. I will still point out teaching moments if I find them.

• Hmm. I'm wondering what kind of store this is.
• Nice description of the setting.
• Desi has a dog. A dog can be a handy secondary character the hero/heroine can talk to, instead of talking to themselves. 
• Oh, it's a summer-only store that her late husband gifted her. That's so sweet. However, I'm assuming she threw the pots herself, as well as painted them, but it's a little unclear. 
• So, she's painting some extremely detailed scenes on her wares. It's not the type of pottery I was imagining. Maybe she's doing porcelain type pottery not regular clay.
• Desi is short for Desiree. That makes sense. All this time I was thinking Desi as in Desi Arnaz of I Love Lucy fame. LOL
• Aha! A coincidence. He just happens to be an air conditioner repairman and she is having problems with her A/C. The coincidence is a time-honored device in Woman's World stories.
• Nice...they barter the plate for the thermostat. I think bartering is something that should be brought back. It would certainly provide a little savings come tax time!

Photo by Francisco Anzola via Flickr Creative Commons License

Crazy "Fore" You

by Marcella Robinson from the August 16, 2021 issue

Tagline: When a rogue golf ball whizzes past his head on the course, Ben is glad for the near miss...and the surprising new shot at love it brings into his life.

Observations: I thought the humor in this story was adorable and it reminded me of an aspect of humor you should keep in mind. I'm talking about inside jokes.

Inside jokes are a two-edged sword. When people use them and don't let other people in on the joke, it can be hurtful. But on the other hand, it's an excellent way to instantly connect with other people, even if you've only known them a couple of minutes.  

In this story, the inside joke was that Olivia had no control over her golf balls when executing a full swing and luckily missed the hero, but hit a tree instead. They laugh about her being a danger to trees a couple of times. The joke is a welcome addition to the story, not only for its entertainment value, but as a way to show the characters connecting. Lack of connection between the hero and heroine is one of the top three reasons editors reject a story and the inside joke is a great tool to have in your connection toolbox.

Photo by Wojciech Kulicki via Flickr Creative Commons License

A Welcome Change

 by Crystal Moore from the August 23, 2021 issue

Tagline: Sharing her home with guests to make some money, Nora is unsure of herself...until handsome singleton Dean comes to stay.

Observations: I always appreciate seeing a story that features modern life and this one was refreshing with its inclusion of the booming industry of vacation rentals and the like. I thought it was a great idea to add that the story of a widow coming to terms with her life after her husband had gone and admitting vacationing guests into her own home. This is a great way to come up with a story idea--think of a tried and true trope and add your own twist to it, or just taking two tropes and putting them together.

For instance, here's a list of fifteen random tropes. Pick two for a mash-up and see if you can think of a story that includes them both.

Library

Nursery (the gardening kind)

Candy shop

Cultural festival

Frozen pond

Mechanic

Grocery store clerk

Single parent

Teacher

Birdwatcher

A puppy

An heirloom

Homemade pie

Blizzard

Family reunion

I choose birdwatcher and library. Maybe someone is new to the neighborhood and puts up a bird feeder that becomes very popular. He or she wants to know what kind of birds are visiting and he goes to the library to find a book on local species. Or maybe I ditch the library. Maybe the person at the store where he/she bought the feeder suggests he/she join the local birdwatching club. Maybe he/she is younger and expects all the club members will be senior citizens, but is pleasantly surprised and meets someone her own age and with many of the same interests.

What if I choose the puppy and the heirloom? Maybe a woman is walking her dog in the park and her dog gets into a scuffle with another dog. No one is harmed, but she realizes her priceless charm bracelet has fallen off her wrist. The owner of the other dog says his grandfather owns a metal detector. Voila. They find the bracelet and love. 

See how it works? Just let your mind wander.

Photo by Elizabeth Backus via Flickr Creative Commons License

A Perfect Match

by Shelley Cooper from the August 9, 2021 issue

Tagline: When Valerie checks in on her new neighbor while he's sick, their meeting sparks a fever in both their hearts that nothing can tame.

Observations: I really enjoyed this matchmaker story. It was also a very loose enemies-to-lovers story as well, which I think is hard to do in 800 words. I loved how the ending was the two daughters celebrating their success on their phones, however, I did think it was a little odd that both parents were each meeting their 12-year-olds at the restaurant, but perhaps that's what it's like in a small town. You can let your pre-teen be much more independent than in the suburbs. 

Photo by Melanie Tata via Flickr Creative Commons License

Special Delivery

 

by Mary Ann Joyce from the August 2, 2021 issue

Tagline: When a black-and-white cat ambles through the pet door of his summer cottage, Sam never expects his arrival to lead to purrfect love.

Observations: I loved this story so much. There are so many things to point out that make this a study in how to write a Woman's World story, I'm not sure I can cover them all, but I'm going to try, laundry-list-style.

Her word choices are so spot on. Here are some of the ones I relished.

watching the summer sunset fade

like an uncle who fell asleep on your couch after a party

the feline vagabond

a pleasant warmth spreading through his chest (<--not overwriting!)

their conversation as natural as apple pie and ice cream (what a comfort-infused simile!)

I am a fan of epistolary novels--novels written as a series of documents--and this mini version was charming. The fact that the notes were exchanged via cat...? Adorable. The humorous and sometimes hilarious little drawings also added greatly
to this element.

I also appreciated how much time passed during the story. It was part of why I was utterly convinced these two had fallen in love.

I adored the happily-ever-after ending as well. The whole story made my heart sing.

Photo by Ivan Radic via Flickr Creative Commons License

The Best Catch Ever

by Elizabeth Palmer from the July 12, 2021 issue

Tagline: John's crush on his fishing-gear saleswoman, Joy, leaves him feeling like a fish out of water...until one fateful day he reels in love.

Observations: I loved this story. I loved how there were two relationships to love--one that was decades old and one that was just beginning.

Initially, we see the wonderful relationship between the two brothers, John and Alan. It was so heartwarming and realistic. We see that they annoy each other, tease each other. They are willing to be each other's wingman. Alan introduced John to his late wife. He's also interested in John's happiness and reminds him that even his late wife wanted him to live his life and move on. All of this is established in the first third of the story. 

But we also see John's crush on Joy and how that developed. 

"Oh, Joy, is it? Just how often do you come here?"

"Often enough..."

We see John's inner conflict--he's a widower. 

We see in one paragraph that John isn't just reacting to an electric hand touch or her looks. His attraction is deeper...

John felt his heart swell. He'd gone from being charmed by Joy, to impressed by her knowledge, to simply being...enchanted.

We get all of this first and so when "her radiant smile took his breath away," it makes total sense. It's not overwriting because the foundation has been laid. This is the kind of of thing you should be striving for and I understand that it's difficult when our word count is so restrictive, but it's this kind of thing that can be the difference between an acceptance or a rejection.

Photo by Cristian Bortes via Flickr Creative Commons License

Father's Day Shenanigans

 by Pamela Moran from the June 21, 2021 issue

Tagline: When Beth Abbott finds herself caught in a matchmaking scheme with the handsome Grant Davis, she never expects it'll lead her to love.

Observations: I wanted to point out that, although there is the traditional three-act structure here, the first act is almost half the story! I haven't collected any hard data, but usually the second act is the longest. However, there was a lot to establish in this story. We meet the precocious Katie (matchmaker #1). We see that Beth is strongly attracted to Grant and vice versa. We discover that Beth's father is complicit. And just at the end of act one, we get the info about the Father's Day brunch the next day.

Act two is the shortest. In it, all four characters meet and agree to have brunch together. (By coincidence? It's unclear. Maybe Katie and Beth's dad were more diabolical than they appeared.)

The third act just cements Beth and Grant's connection as Grant asks Beth out to dinner. There's a marvelous exchange--the whole story is, really--where we see the characters' amusement over the matchmaker's shenanigans, emphasizing the story's title.

Favorite line: Me, out in the wild at the hardware store was certainly not my finest look.

The Sweetest Treat of All

by Veda Boyd Jones from the June 14, 2021 issue

Tagline: When the ice-cream truck rolls through his neighborhood one warm summer day, David is surprised to find new love on the menu.

*Stream of Consciousness Observations: Ice-cream trucks bring back such happy memories for me of the Big Sticks and the Strawberry Shortcake ice cream bars I used to love. I'm sure they bring similar nostalgic feelings for other readers too.

Oh, I love David's strategy of tiring the kids out so they'd go to sleep that evening. Smart!

Aha! Jones cleverly gave the heroine the information that David was their uncle, not their dad, using dialogue. 

LMAO at this line:

He glanced at his watch to stop her from seeing him blush. "It seems like they've been gone four days, not four hours."

There's a little grey moment where David thinks his employee might have a prior "claim" on Maggie, but this is quickly resolved when Maggie says she's friends with the employee's girlfriend.

We have a sort of black moment when David thinks he'll never see her again. But I'm thinking, "Dude, your employee is dating a friend of hers. It would be very easy to make contact." So black moment for him, not for the reader.

I'm just as excited to hear the chime of the truck again as Josie was. LOL

Oh, David, you just ruined your plan of exhausting the kids with mulching by amping them up with sugar! LOL

Awww, sweet (pardon the pun) ending!

*This is an analysis in which I just record my thoughts as I read the story.

Photo by Rafael Moreno via Flickr Creative Commons License

In the Market for True Love

 

by Joan Dayton from the June 7, 2021 issue

Tagline: Jeff's trips to the supermarket have left him with a crush on cashier Sandra. But will his latest walk down the produce aisle prove a recipe for love?

Observations: This story was told from the point of view of an adorable older man who is nervous about approaching his grocery store crush. Most of the story is just him thinking about all of the wonderful qualities Sandra has--her silver-streaked hair, her crow's feet, her perfume, her empathy and all the things they have in common. He's so love-struck, you find yourself really rooting for him to find his courage and ask Sandra out. Because this is a Woman's World story, of course he does, even if he does stammer a little.

Simply adorable!

Love is a Cake Walk

by Cher Tom from the May 17, 2021 issue

Tagline: When a handsome stranger stops into her bakery, Jaycee never expects the sweet treat that his visit has in store for her.

Observations: First of all, congratulations to Cher Tom! I helped her edit this story and I'm thrilled it got published! Woot woot woot!

I think Cher revised it even more after we worked on it together and I love the way she or the editors transformed it from a story about a May Day tradition to a wedding anniversary tradition. Great job.

Remember, you, too, can get my help polishing up a story. Click here for details.

Photo by Kimberly Vardeman via Flickr Creative Commons License

Raindrops and Butterflies

 by Pamela Moran from the May 10, 2021 issue

Tagline: When her childhood crush and neighbor, Todd, comes over to help Abby plant flowers for Mother's Day, love is in full bloom.

Observations: This is another example of how you can rely on oft used Woman's World tropes and still end up with a heartwarming story that the editors love. (And I did love this story, especially the dad and his satisfied smile.) A trope is defined as a common or overused theme or device. I embrace tropes and prefer to think of them as tried and true rather than cliche.

The tropes Moran used were 

• gardening 
• a quasi-matchmaker (Did her dad invite Todd over? The author left us guessing.)
• a helpful man (also known as man to the rescue)
• a late, beloved family member
• a post activity piece of pie

Honestly, sometimes I think about making some giant dice out of cardboard, writing tropes on them with sticky notes, then rolling them and challenging myself to write a story using those tropes.

In fact, here's printable pattern for a paper cube in case you think this is a good idea too. 

Photo by Stephanie via Flickr Creative Commons License

A Charming "Tail"

by Crystal Moore from the May 3, 2021 issue

Tagline: After running into a handsome stranger at the post office, Kat, a professional dog walker, gets the chance to have a whole new "leash" on love.

Observations: This week, I wanted to point out the utility of having an animal in a story, beyond the fact that the editors seem to like animals in stories. The animal can come in handy when the hero or heroine needs someone to talk to, as in this story.

Here, Kat is regretting they way she'd acted and is berating herself via her furry client...

"Who am I, Cinderella?" she asked Gus, her long-eared companion padding beside her in the park. "A clock strikes and I take off like a greyhound. I could've spared a few minutes to find out if he was single. Turned on the charm--maybe gotten his number. No offense," she said, stooping to scratch the hound's ears, "but my love life is going to the dogs."

Sure, the character can talk to herself or have thoughts in the narrative, but this dog served as the perfect sounding board. I wouldn't necessarily put a dog in the story for the sole purpose of being a sounding board, but if your story already has an animal in it, this is something you might want to do.

Photo by Alex Beattle via Flickr Creative Commons License

The Sweetest Love Story and Love Blooms in Spring

 byAmy Oliveira and MarciMcEachern, from the April 19 and April 26 issues, respectively

Taglines: After inheriting a candy shop, Evelyn can't see how she can afford to keep it...until handsome Tom opens her eyes to all the sweet possibilities.

When her handsome new neighbor approaches with a fun request, Lori's love life is suddenly blossoming with promise.

Observations: Both of these stories were excellent, but unfortunately, I couldn't find any teaching moments in either of them. It's hard sometimes, guys! 

Photos by LoriCaliforny and David Howard via the Flickr Creative Commons License

Oh, What a Knight?

by Chris Maday Schmidt from the April 12, 2021 issue

Tagline: When her elevator gets stuck on the way to a meeting, Sutton thinks she's out of luck...until a hunky passenger steps in...

Observations: Ms. Schmidt is very good at utilizing the single-sentence for a laugh. Check this out.

I think about that morning's call with the director of my nana and pop's assisted living facility, the hefty payment due for their care. And how my immediate fiscal status hangs in limbo.

Like this elevator.

In comedy, timing is everything. And that little pause after "limbo," makes all the difference.

Here are the other two examples from her story. In this one, she uses an m-dash instead of making the punchline a separate sentence, but the effect is the same.

With the clock ticking, I hitch up my skirt a few modest inches, raise my arms to grasp the ledge, and hoist myself--one centimeter.

And the last example...

GQ clears his throat. My skin tingles with awareness. Or heat rash.

Very funny stuff. Definitely put the one-sentence punchline in your writer's toolbox.