A Super Bowl Surprise

by Jill Weatherholt from the February 4, 2019 issue

Tagline: After her husband passed away, Janie couldn't even think about playing the field...until a chance meeting got her back in the game.

Observations: This was a cute Super Bowl-themed matchmaker story. I enjoyed it. I was surprised to see the actual words "Super Bowl" used in the story because the NFL is notorious about protecting their copyright. I was in Las Vegas during Super Bowl weekend and the Aria Resort and Casino didn't even use the words Super Bowl. Instead, they said "The Big Game." But then again, they were using the words to advertise an event, so maybe that's the difference. Does anyone still have the magazine? Because I'd expect they would not be able to use Super Bowl on the cover, since the cover sells the magazine.

Janie Edmiston tried not to smile. -- I find myself wondering why she didn't want to smile.

I liked the idea of them meeting at the sporting goods store while buying jerseys, however, they're going to buy full-on jerseys? Just for the party? Maybe this is just a case of the author and/or editors not really differentiating between shirts and jerseys, because why not just a T-shirt? Jerseys run about $75 to $150. Maybe I'm just cheap, but I attended a 60s themed party once and I wanted to spend as little as I could get away with because I wasn't going to wear any of it again. Also, of all the Super Bowl parties, I've attended, I've never seen anyone actually wear team colors, let alone actual gear. But maybe, because I live in LA, people are just "too cool" to do that kind of thing. LOL

Seasoned Woman's World readers will immediately realize Janie and Drew will end up at the same party. This is not necessarily a bad thing. Often, it gives readers that feeling of being in on a secret that the characters are unaware of, sort of like being invited to a surprise party, which is so much fun.

"...the door opened with a sweeping gesture." -- Is this grammatically correct? It's clear what the author meant. We can all picture it, but I think the sentence is suggesting the door gestured.

She stopped just shy of the fridge, her heart hammering in her chest. -- I notice this is the third time her heart did something. As a writer, you may not notice that you are repeating yourself or that you are using a "crutch" word or phrase. I find my characters constantly chuckling, smiling and shrugging. It's something I have to be on guard for and sometimes it's better to have someone else read over your story because we often don't notice our crutch words in our own work.

"I can't wait to see what happens next." -- This struck me as a kind of odd thing to say, especially as the ending sentence of the story. If it had been my story, I might try to throw something football related in and I would have had to reach out to friends who are football fans because I'm a hockey girl, through and through.

I think it might have been good to include one more mention of Janie's getting over the death of her husband two years prior. We get that info at the beginning of the story and then never hear anything more. To show Janie's growth more clearly, I would like to have seen her think about her late husband just once more -- perhaps a memory of how much he loved her salsa or maybe he insisted on buying jerseys for the team he was rooting for, so that's why she spent so much money, to keep the tradition alive.

As always, these are just my opinions. Your mileage may vary. :)

Photo by: Ted Kerwin via Flickr CC license

More Than Puppy Love

by Alyssa Symon from the January 28, 2019 issue

Tagline: Erika had given up on finding love, content with the unconditional affection from her furry friends, until a serendipitous accident gave her new hope.

Observations: I wanted to analyze the black moment in this story because it was particularly nice.

Boy meets girl.
Boy tends to girl's bumped head.
Girl confesses:

"I love animals. I had a dog growing up, Scotty. He was my best friend. My parents worked a lot, but Scotty was always there for me. I wanted to give other kids the opportunity to have a best friend like Scotty..."

Boy goes silent for a moment.
Girl thinks boy thinks she's wacko for having a dog for a best friend.
Boy confesses...he's a vet!

I really liked how Erika's self-doubt made us really feel for her. We've all felt that uncertainty that we've stuck our foot (or paw!) in our mouth.

I also thought the ending--where he brought the hot cocoa to her, and they drank a toast to animals--was perfect.

Photo credit: Marco Verch via Flickr CC license

The True Love Experiment

by Elizabeth Palmer from the January 21, 2019 issue

Tagline: Christie was having no luck finding her Prince Charming using her friend's supposedly fail-safe dating method...until Dan stepped in to save the day.

Observations: I loved this friends-to-lovers story.

Elizabeth Palmer is a regular contributor to the magazine and this story proves she knows what she's doing. At the beginning of the tale, she talks about Christie suffering through some bum dates. She could have described them, perhaps milking them for comic effect, which is something I might have done. But she chose not to, which is another perfectly valid choice, because Woman's World magazine celebrates the positive. It's almost like that old saying, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." If you go that route when writing your stories, you'll probably not go wrong.

We saw Dan being chivalrous (but with an ulterior motive, of course), which is always a good trait in a Prince Charming and in a Woman's World story hero. We also saw the heroine not being passive by saying, "Well, I'm free tomorrow night." That's right, Christie. You go, girl.

Palmer also nailed the ending with that text.

Photo by Ian Lee via Flickr CC license

News from the Editor

There is a Facebook group for WW Writers (link in the side bar) that Alessandra Renna, the new Fiction Editor, visits and posts on every once in a while. I'm going to make an effort to pass on the info here for those who don't use Facebook. These are her words, cut and pasted.

Jan 11, 2019  Jan 31, 2019

Firstly, and most importantly, in our romance section, we have started to promote books and novellas by our wonderful authors! What this means for writers who have submitted or have had their pieces accepted to appear in Woman's World is that alongside your submission, we would also love to hear about any books you have upcoming or have published in the recent past (2-3 years ago), where they are available for purchase, and for you to attach a hi-res jpeg of the book cover for us!

Secondly, the criteria for selection have been altered slightly, so I wanted to offer some quick 'guidelines' so everyone knows what's being looked for (and chosen!) for both romance and mini mysteries. Here are some quick things to include in future submissions, as well as some themes that our editors are loving right now!

Romance:
—your contact information (name, address, e-mail, phone #)
—stories with LOTS of chemistry, i.e. gazing into the eyes, stomaches erupting in butterflies, etc. NOTE: this does NOT mean racy! Just evocative description of the sparks of first love flying
—hopeful endings/kickers that leave the reader feeling like the future is bright and anything is possible
—love in later life—our readers are LOVING stories about people who find love later in life, so keep them coming!
—witty banter/flirtation
—love-hate stories. Our editor has a fondness for stories where the protagonist has a love/hate relationship that quickly turns to love
—super seasonal stories. As we are a weekly, be sure to keep in mind the holidays/weather patterns that are in play for your selection. As we are moving into April and May, Mother's Day comes to mind :)

Jan 25, 2019

I just checked in with my colleague in accounting here at the magazine, and she suggested that it would be helpful for any writers who have not been published within the last 12 months or for writers who have never published with us before to indicate that fact alongside their submissions. It would be as simple as adding a line at the top of your submission stating, "I am a new writer for Woman's World" or "I haven't been published in the magazine for the past 12 months".

This will flag our accounting team that you are a new writer who will need to receive a W9 alongside their contract, should your story be selected! As usual, please include your full name (the name you will be using on the contracts, as well as your pen name, should you have one), address and a line indicating that you are a new writer alongside any submissions. For those of you who have already submitted and are new to Woman's World/haven't been published in the last 12 months AND have had a story selected for publication, you can always e-mail me at apollock@bauerpublishing.com to let me know that you are a new writer, and I will give our accounting department a heads up.

Jan 31, 2019

In the coming weeks, we will be looking for Easter-themed submissions for both mini mysteries and romance selections, so please feel free to send any and all that you may have in the works to us at fiction@womansworldmag.com.