Tagline: Businesswoman Lila Parker has a meeting about the future of her start-up. But when she makes a professional faux pas, it just might lead to love.
Observations: I was utterly surprised by the twist in this story! Brava, Ms. Schmidt! This plot twist was so well done that after I read the story, I re-read the story to experience everything but with the knowledge that he was her client. What a delight.
Photo by Moresheth via Flickr CCL
Tagline: When her friends set her up, Maggie didn't expect to meet with the handsome clerk from the farmers market...or for it to become true love.
Stream of Consciousness Observations:
"I tuck a chin-length silver lock behind my ear..." -- She's an older heroine. :) She's also a female. It's nice to have the gender of the main character identified right off the bat.
And she's getting set up for a blind date. Fun! I haven't read one of these for a while.
"I step off the covered deck where I'm surrounded by juniper, pines and oak tress adorned in autumn yellow beneath an evening sky streaked with orange." -- Oh, what a lovely description of the setting.
"The twinkle in his gray eyes calms my racing heart, but my pulse skips a beat when his fingers clasp my upper arms." -- Here is the physical attraction, nicely done.
"Surely he must think I'm experiencing a midlife moment in the center of of the cul-de-sac." -- LOLOLOLOL!
"He brushes that same silver lock from my cheek and my skin tingles at his touch." -- Schmidt is really pouring on the physical reactions. This is the sixth instance of some sort of reaction from Maggie and I seem to remember Woman's World liking a lot of that. which is why, for a while, every story had hearts leaping, soaring, dancing, twirling, etc.
"So what's say we skip the whole awkward blind date thing and catch dinner at the lodge down the road?" -- Oh, golly, this seems rude to me. The neighbors have prepared a meal for them. I see later in the story that Schmidt shows Maggie growing as a character when she asks him to share her casserole at her own home, so I understand why she chose to have them decline dinner at the neighbor's. Okay, wait a second. I just thought of something. Maybe, once the neighbors see that their "evil plan" has worked, they might not mind.
Cute story! And a great example of an evergreen story too. Evergreen stories are stories that can be slotted in at anytime during the year. Sure, there is a mention of pumpkin bread and autumn yellow, but those tiny details could be easily changed. Keep in mind that evergreen stories are valuable to the editors because of their flexibility.
Photo by Judy Dean via Flickr Creative Commons License
Tagline: Honey Lambert's life is full of all work and no play...until a handsome stranger sits down next to her and fills her world with new possibilities
Observations: First of all, sorry about the late analysis of this story. I don't know where this issue was hiding, but I just now found it.
I usually love Schmidt's stories, but I feel she missed two opportunities to ground the reader in the setting.
Honey Lambert owns the Honey Stand. We don't get any description of the Honey Stand, so my brain provided me with an image of a side-of-the-road honey stand. Later, near the end of the story, we find out that the Honey Stand has a back room and a shop floor, which suggests it's in an actual building. This came as a bit of a surprise, causing me to revise what I'd been picturing in my head. Any time this happens to a reader, they're pulled out of the narrative which is something you want to avoid if possible.
After getting ice cream from the ice cream truck, Honey sits at a table with a massive umbrella. Usually ice cream trucks are mobile, so it's a little coincidental that there happens to be a table there. Also, all the ice cream trucks I've ever encountered sell pre-packaged treats like Big Sticks and Push-Ups, not scoops of ice cream or sundaes.
Unless, and this is probably the case, in this story it's a food truck ice cream truck, the kind of food truck that is parked in a semi-permanent location. If this is the case, I want this to be clear so I can really picture the scene and so I can be jealous of the heroine because who wouldn't want to be in front of a food truck specializing in ice cream?
Your experience of the story might have differed, and obviously the things I mentioned didn't bother the editors, but regardless, clearly establishing your setting is always a good idea.
Photo by Ben Phillips via the Flickr Creative Commons License
Tagline: While fixing up her father's house after he passed, Jenna meets Jack in the caulk aisle...and gest a loving sign from above.
Observations: On the negative side, I wondered at the hankie. The hero has dark hair, so he's young-ish and I'm finding it a little hard to swallow that he carries an actual handkerchief.
I also wondered if this handyman just trolls the aisles of the hardware store for clients, which I guess is good business but a little strange.
On the other hand, this story had an otherworldly element to it that I don't often see--that mysterious older gentleman. I assume it's her dad appearing as an angel, which I really liked. Don't we all hope our loved ones who have gone to the great beyond are watching over us?
I also absolutely loved that she was a children's book author. That's an occupation I've not seen in any Woman's World stories. This is where research can come in handy--and by research I mean subscribing to the magazine so you can read every story. If you're familiar with what's been done, it's easier to insert something they haven't seen before.
Photo by Nan Fry via Flickr Creative Commons License
by Chris Maday Schmidt from the April 12, 2021 issue
Tagline: When her elevator gets stuck on the way to a meeting, Sutton thinks she's out of luck...until a hunky passenger steps in...
Observations: Ms. Schmidt is very good at utilizing the single-sentence for a laugh. Check this out.
I think about that morning's call with the director of my nana and pop's assisted living facility, the hefty payment due for their care. And how my immediate fiscal status hangs in limbo.
Like this elevator.
In comedy, timing is everything. And that little pause after "limbo," makes all the difference.
Here are the other two examples from her story. In this one, she uses an m-dash instead of making the punchline a separate sentence, but the effect is the same.
With the clock ticking, I hitch up my skirt a few modest inches, raise my arms to grasp the ledge, and hoist myself--one centimeter.
And the last example...
GQ clears his throat. My skin tingles with awareness. Or heat rash.
Very funny stuff. Definitely put the one-sentence punchline in your writer's toolbox.
