Let it Snow! by Joan Dayton

from the January 9, 2017 issue

Tagline: Susan thought she'd never love again...until she met Dan!

Woman's World Tropes: Man to the rescue, independent woman, matchmaker family member, widow, moving on

Observations: There is a great deal of information packed into the first two paragraphs. I haven't talked about this in a while, but backstory dumps are a-okay in Woman's World stories. You don't have time to dribble it in a bit at a time, like you do in a novel. Quick and dirty, ladies! Everything is compressed in an 800 word story.

Here's what Dayton stuffed in there:

• Susan needs a snowblower.
• Susan is new in town and new to Minnesota weather.
• She has a daughter and granddaughter.
• Susan has become a do-it-yourselfer.
• Susan had help with this transformation.
• The helper is single.

After that, still in Act One, she's just as efficient.

• Dan is proactive about helping Susan when she comes to the store.
• Dan and Susan are still dancing around their mutual attraction. ("I wouldn't want to trouble you...")
• Dan makes a subtle move to show he's attracted. ("I really admire how you dove in and tackled all those home projects.")
• They start using first names.

Act Two, we see the plot moving forward when the daughter gives Susan the push she needs.

Act Three, the scene is all set. The reader is just sitting there waiting and hoping it will turn out all right. And it does. Dayton throws in some romance for good measure--Dan snow-blowing a heart in Susan's driveway. Totally adorable. 

In my opinion, the story would have ended nicely after he says "All the time in the world" but Dayton went even further and brought back the fact that Dan's face lit up when he smiled, which was mentioned earlier in the story.

This was a well-crafted and enjoyable story.

Photo credit: Janine via Flickr Creative Commons License

Heart's Desire by Shelley Cooper

April 11, 2016 issue

Tagline: When Jill found her heart's passion, love wasn't far behind!

Observations: I really liked this story. I think there were a lot of small details in this story that Woman's World likes. I thought I'd list them. Small things add up.

1. A grandma is mentioned. Family is important.

2. Proving an old saying to be true, especially when a grandma is saying it, is a reliable trope for Woman's World.

3. Jill's sister is a stay-at-home mom. While Woman's World supports many modern beliefs, like women working, etc., they still do value old fashioned ones.

4. Brother is in the Navy, a noble career.

5. Jill's initiative is very important. She's such an upbeat character, you couldn't help but like her. If she's not happy, she doesn't mope around and complain or blame. She gets out there and does something about it. This is KEY.

6. Jill is full of gratitude and she's willing to demonstrate it.

7. Jill has a sense of humor and so does Jack.

8. Cooper adds so much romance by having Jack propose in the coffee shop where they had their first date. Not only that, but Jack thinks of getting her a heart-shaped diamond. Brilliant! (Pun intended.)

9. Cooper also brings the story full circle by quoting the saying again.

Photo credit: Marnee Pearce via the Flickr Creative Commons License

Unforgettable

by Rosemary Hayes from the June 22, 2015 issue

Tagline: Callie would never forget the day she lost her cellphone...and found love

Observations: Okay, this story gave me a little ripple of happiness at the base of my neck. Sometimes it's the goosebumps on the arm, but this time it was the neck.

I wanted to point out a story device I'm going to call bookending. We've talked about it before. I've also called it coming full circle. It's where you mention something at the beginning of the story and then mention it again at the end. What's cool about this example is how Hayes bookended using POV as well.

At the beginning of the story, the narrator Callie talks about special dates that stick in our minds. It's something everyone experiences and it helps us feel a connection with the storyteller. In this little section, we're a bit removed, as is the narrator.

Then Hayes eases into the real story, introducing it with that ellipsis and then going into a deeper POV so that we are Callie on the day she lost her cell phone and fell in love with the man who found it. We happily live the story of how they met, smiling and hoping that romance will win the day.

And then, boom, Hayes states a date: June 24. And just like that, we're zipped back out of the story and looking at the events from a distance again because Callie has resumed her role as narrator. She summarizes what happened with Ethan after that first meeting in the cafe, and it works. We don't need to be Callie any more because now we're like friends and she just finished telling the story of how she met the love of her life.

It's a nice little device to have in your writer's toolbox.

Clever/funny lines:

1. My stomach fluttered. I wasn't sure if it was because of his friendly laugh or because I had found a kindred "loser."

2. "I'm in the cafe across the street, actually. I'll be the person with two phones on the table."

Photo credit: SGT Christopher M. Gaylord, via Wikimedia Commons

A Very Good Plot

by Laurel Winter from the June 8, 2015 issue

Tagline: Marie realized that a garden was a very nice place for love to grow!

Observations: I adored this story for so many reasons. It was so very skillfully written and I'll point out what impressed me.

In the beginning, we get a good feel for who Marie is. Right off the bat, we see her attraction to the man who parked next to her. We find out she has a small balcony that is too small for a garden planter, but big enough for the table where she would like to entertain. She likes to garden.

Then we see the guy again. We see he's polite, and that helps the reader like him as a potential mate for the heroine.

He waved her toward the garden gate. "You first," he said. "I have to figure out where I'm going."

We find out about the mix-up and there is some minor tension while we wonder how they'll fix the solution and then the guy suggests they share the garden plot. Is he interested? Maybe! We read on to find out.

For a little while we see them bonding and forming a connection through a thing they both like to do and when the day is over, we see them commit to the next day as a couple would, negotiating...

"Are you coming tomorrow?" she asked. "I mean, if we want to work together..."

"I'd like that," he said. "Around nine or ten?"

"Eight-thirty might be better," she said. "A good start before it gets too hot."

"You're right.," Greg agreed.

He offers to bring her coffee and asks how she likes it, so he's thoughtful and considerate, another plus.

Then, the best part is the ending. After all the groundwork has been laid for Greg and Marie's blooming (sorry about the pun) romance, the author refers back to the three goals Marie had thought about at the beginning of the story--having dirt under her fingernails, tomatoes in her future, and the possibility of having a friend over to share a drink on her tiny balcony. BOOM. That's how it's done, ladies and gentlemen.

Photo credit: Stacy via Flickr Creative Commons

Small Town, Big Hearts

by Shannon Fay from the March 4, 2013 issue

Tagline: It seemed to Tim that everyone in Pine Falls was weighing in on his date with Cheryl. But was that a bad thing?

In a Nutshell: Tim is on a coffee date with the new newspaper editor. They live in Pine Falls, a small town. The date goes a teensy bit south when Tim accidentally spills water on her. While she's in the ladies room cleaning up, several townspeople offer friendly advice.

Observations: I loved this story. I'm so thankful to Mary Ann for scanning and sending it to me.

Tim is adorable. He has quite a few heroic qualities. First, I love his uncertainty here.

When I asked her out for coffee, I hadn't actually expected her to say yes.

How cute is that? Also, you have the fact that he's a family practitioner, dedicated to keeping the people in his town healthy. But he's not a wimp. When he feels people are ganging up on him, he doesn't hesitate to (kindly) tell them to back off.

The part I really loved was when Cheryl was off stage. Those teenaged boys piping in. Hilarious that they're such dating experts that they're razzing Tim. Even funnier was Tim's thoughts...

"Thank you Jeremy," I replied and made a mental note to see if his shots were up to date.

Then the basketball coach tells him to stop monopolizing the conversation. Someone else suggests he ask Cheryl about her new job. The waitress brings a piece of pie that he's to use as a sort of apology. I can just picture that entire scene unfolding. It's everything we city people imagine small town life to be. All Andy Taylor and Aunt Bee-ish. Right?

And I often talk about tying the end of the story into something you mention at the beginning. This time, the author did it with something near the end of the story and it works just as neatly. After all those people offer all that advice, Tim thinks, Sometimes I really hate small towns. But at the end when everything turns out well, he thinks, Sometimes I really love small towns. Perfect, neat, and tidy!

Photo by Rocker_44 (cc)

Hidden Treasures

by Marie Savage from the September 5, 2010 issue

Tagline: Lauren and Jason had a lot in common--including a mutual attraction to antiques and to each other

Photo by Joeflintham (cc)

In a Nutshell: Lauren is an interior designer and her aunt owns an antique shop, so she's always on the lookout for antiques. At an estate sale, she's attracted to the man running it. When he delivers the desk she buys from him, they make a date.

Observations: I haven't seen a story that revolves around a loved one's advice or saying in a while. In this case, it's Lauren's aunt who is always telling her, "You never know when you're going to find a treasure."

Often, the saying has to do with finding love, like "Love can be right around the corner," and the heroine bumps into a guy while rounding the corner at the grocery store.

Other times, like in this story, the saying, at first glance, doesn't seem to have anything to do with romance, but when you put in context, you see that it can. When we first hear the saying, "You never know when you'll find a treasure," we assume Aunt Susan was talking about antiques and garage sales. Later, after Lauren has met Jason, you realize that this man could be a treasure.

I like this kind of twist in a story, and it provides a nice way to bring the tale full circle. Using sayings, especially when imparted by loved ones, is a nice jumping off point for stories, if you're ever looking for ideas.

"Wish Upon a Star"

by Susan Flett Swiderski from the January 17, 2011 issue

Tagline: Kelly put her whole heart into it, so she wasn't surprised when her biggest wish came true...

In a Nutshell: After wishing on a star, young Kelly sets up a meeting between her father and her teacher. The two adults realize they've been duped, but hit it off anyway. They keep their burgeoning relatonship a secret from the little girl, but when the school year ends, they tell her they want to get married.

Observations: Matchmaker stories are common within the pages of Woman's World magazine. This time, the matchmaker is only six years old! I've tried subterfuge stories before, but never with much success. (In fact, one story I sent that was rejected, involved a daughter setting up her father and her teacher.) However, once in a while you do see a story in which someone tricks a character into something. I had thought that Woman's World frowned on children doing so, but here's proof that they don't.

Notice that this story changes points of view. We start out in Kelly's pov. Then when the adults meet, we switch to the dad's. Later when the secret is about to be revealed, we go back to Kelly's. This is unusual, but well done. Each of these changes had to happen, because Kelly had no way of knowing what went on in the classroom during that after school meeting. And later, the author wanted to bring us full circle to the wishing on a star idea, which meant returning to Kelly. This was a tricky thing to do and Swiderski nailed it.

On a side note, I loved the idea that little Kelly didn't blindly trust to the whims of the wish, but knew that she needed to take action herself in order to get the ball rolling. What a wise little girl!

Something Magical

by Clare Mishica from the March 29, 2010 issue

Tagline: On a starry, moonlit night a beautiful raven-haired woman helped Zach's heart begin to heal...

In a Nutshell: Zach is a widower who reluctantly goes to his sister's place for the weekend and a party. When he finds his daughter, not in bed like she's supposed to be, downstairs with a female party guest, he finds himself as enchanted as his daughter. Turns out the woman is his nephews' teacher. They find they have a mutual dislike of party scenes and make a "date" to have coffee in the kitchen instead.

Observations: With "Something Magical," we get a very good feel for Zach and what a good father he is, how shy and sad he is. Readers seem to like seeing wounded characters--often widows/widowers--find love again. They enjoy seeing the sun come out on these characters' lives and helps us feel more optimistic about our own lives.

Notice the "lesson learned" ending. This type of ending typically shows the character reflecting on their own character arc. Sometimes it's even something a loved one or friend talked about at the beginning of the story and when the author ends the story with that same observation, it gives the story a feeling of having come full-circle.

For example, the ending for "Something Magical" is:

Zach climbed the steps two at a time, thinking how sometimes you don't realize that there's something missing in your life until, unexpectedly, you find it.

This would have been one of those full-circle stories if Mishica had had Zach wonder that something was missing in his life or have him feel like he needed to find something. But I can see why she didn't do the former. If you're a widower and single father, if you start thinking something's missing in your life, it would seem pretty obvious what it was. :)

Dear Santa

by April Knight from the December 7, 2009 issue.

Tagline: Tory's letter to Santa helped her discover what love is really all about...

In a Nutshell: When Tory's co-worker at the Dollar Store suggests she ask Santa for a man for Christmas, Tory writes a letter requesting a gorgeous, fantasy man, but she immediately feels wistful because that type of man would probably never be interested in her.

Then, in walks an average guy who wants gifts for kids at the school where he used to work as a teacher, but because of layoffs, is now working as a custodian.

In the course of conversation, he remarks, "I keep hoping some nice lady will put me on her wish list, but I don't think anyone would be interested in an unemployed teacher." He invites them to a holiday program his school is putting on and leaves.

Tory realizes the custodial Santa is more in line with what she really wants for Christmas.

Observations: This story follows the classic three act structure. Act One: We start out with the convo between the friends, setting up the goal: Tory wants a man for Christmas. After she determines that she wants someone rich, handsome, and strong, we get the conflict: she's feels she's undesirable (short, 20 pounds overweight, has a sucky job.) And immediately, probably every woman who reads Woman's World identifies with her.

Act Two: The hero comes in. We find out he has sparkly brown eyes. He's not married, which is always a fact that you have to establish in these "first meet" stories. He's dedicated to his (ex-)job. Through some clever conversation, Knight gets him to confess he's wanting a lady for Christmas, just like Tory is. Lastly, he leaves the flyer for the program, which acts as the plot device so that Tory can contact him/see him again.

Act Three: Tory realizes how shallow and insincere she was when she jotted that letter to Santa, hence the character grows during the course of the story. Each of her worries about her own flaws, the hero has. She's short and so is he. She's overweight and he's losing his hair. She's insecure about her job, he's a custodian. There is no real climactic moment when we fear all is lost. We only get a little devil's advocate conversation with the co-worker, but the story still works.

My Favorite Part: Even though Tory is sad when she says this, I laughed: "I wonder if some man is writing a list of things he's looking for in a woman. Do you think he'd say he wanted a short, brown-haired woman who's twenty pounds overweight and who works in an 'everything's a dollar' store?"

My Nit-Picks: Political correctness often rubs me the wrong way, especially when it's contrived. For instance, in the first Twilight movie, Bella's circle of friends was so perfectly, and implausibly, racially balanced. I fully embrace multi-culturalism but don't think it's necessary to twist a story in order to appear all-inclusive.

In "Dear Santa," Knight (or the editor) chose to list three holidays:

"I made it a tradition to give each of my kindergartners a Christmas, Chanukah, or Kwaanza gift."

*sighs* Don't get me wrong. I respect everyone's choices as to religion and/or holiday. To each his own. But wouldn't it have just been easier to say, "a holiday gift?"

Also, the ending line is "I guess I do believe in Santa after all," and I think Knight missed an excellent opportunity to make the story come full circle if she'd had Rose say she didn't believe in Santa at the beginning of the story.