Wading for Mr. Right

by Mary Ann Joyce from the May 18, 2020 issue

Tagline: When Isabel heads to the river to try her hand at fly-fishing, she never expects her catch-of-the-day will be a new chance at love.

Stream-of-Consciousness Observations:

• The very first sentence offers so much information. Isabel writes for a magazine, she likes trying new things and she just ended a relationship. 
• In the second paragraph, we get more of a feel for Isabel and I have to say, I like her. She's a go-getter. She's confident and fine with being alone.
• Love that description..."...a handsome fisherman had arrived, his square-jawed profile etched against the blue cloudless sky." Um, I'll have what she's having.
• LOLing at her trying to pretend she's fine to save a little face. These aren't the days when women/girls do the opposite--pretend to need help so the man will feel useful.
• Oh, no! I feel sorry for her. Those river rocks can be slippery. I'm reminded of the times I've hiked with my family and my boys and husband are always hovering nearby just in case I slip.
• He looks familiar? Hm.
• I love sexy stubble. I want to be president of the Sexy Stubble Fan Club.
• I love this exchange where they exchange names and Tom isn't going to let her disappear.
• What????? Tom is the author of the book she was using to learn to fly-fish? SURPRISE ACHIEVED! Excellent plot twist that I didn't see coming.
• And I'm a total sucker for that thing where he stands behind her and teaches her. In what might have been a nod to #metoo, he asks her permission first.
• LOL at "This, she thought, is so much better than the video!"
• Hm...to let the fish go you still have to take it off the hook. At least I hope they do. It would be really cruel to let it go with the hook still in its mouth.
• When he accuses her of showing off, I just happy-sigh. What a charmer.
• Perfect ending. Bravo, Mary Ann.

Photo by Loren Kerns via Flickr CC license

A Garden of Lasting Love

by Christine Greifzu from the May 4, 2020 issue

Tagline: After a puppy tears through her freshly planted flowers, Michelle finds romance blooming between her and the pup's handsome owner.

Observations: I don't have that much to share this week but I wanted to point out some fantastic verbs the author used in this story. Sparkling verbs are a wonderful and succinct way to liven up your prose.

"Barney, come here!" He dashed after the pup, who darted band and forth playfully. Small chunks of grass erupted from the lawn as the lively game of cat and mouse continued.

Suddenly, the man snagged the leash trailing behind the dog and scooped him into his arms. Turning to face Michelle, he stared at her aghast. "I'm so sorry...before I knew what happened, he'd yanked the leash from my grip. Look at this mess!"

See what a vivid picture the author painted? You can really envision this scene unfolding.

Photo by Heather Ruiz via Flickr cc license