The Best Catch Ever

by Elizabeth Palmer from the July 12, 2021 issue

Tagline: John's crush on his fishing-gear saleswoman, Joy, leaves him feeling like a fish out of water...until one fateful day he reels in love.

Observations: I loved this story. I loved how there were two relationships to love--one that was decades old and one that was just beginning.

Initially, we see the wonderful relationship between the two brothers, John and Alan. It was so heartwarming and realistic. We see that they annoy each other, tease each other. They are willing to be each other's wingman. Alan introduced John to his late wife. He's also interested in John's happiness and reminds him that even his late wife wanted him to live his life and move on. All of this is established in the first third of the story. 

But we also see John's crush on Joy and how that developed. 

"Oh, Joy, is it? Just how often do you come here?"

"Often enough..."

We see John's inner conflict--he's a widower. 

We see in one paragraph that John isn't just reacting to an electric hand touch or her looks. His attraction is deeper...

John felt his heart swell. He'd gone from being charmed by Joy, to impressed by her knowledge, to simply being...enchanted.

We get all of this first and so when "her radiant smile took his breath away," it makes total sense. It's not overwriting because the foundation has been laid. This is the kind of of thing you should be striving for and I understand that it's difficult when our word count is so restrictive, but it's this kind of thing that can be the difference between an acceptance or a rejection.

Photo by Cristian Bortes via Flickr Creative Commons License

Father's Day Shenanigans

 by Pamela Moran from the June 21, 2021 issue

Tagline: When Beth Abbott finds herself caught in a matchmaking scheme with the handsome Grant Davis, she never expects it'll lead her to love.

Observations: I wanted to point out that, although there is the traditional three-act structure here, the first act is almost half the story! I haven't collected any hard data, but usually the second act is the longest. However, there was a lot to establish in this story. We meet the precocious Katie (matchmaker #1). We see that Beth is strongly attracted to Grant and vice versa. We discover that Beth's father is complicit. And just at the end of act one, we get the info about the Father's Day brunch the next day.

Act two is the shortest. In it, all four characters meet and agree to have brunch together. (By coincidence? It's unclear. Maybe Katie and Beth's dad were more diabolical than they appeared.)

The third act just cements Beth and Grant's connection as Grant asks Beth out to dinner. There's a marvelous exchange--the whole story is, really--where we see the characters' amusement over the matchmaker's shenanigans, emphasizing the story's title.

Favorite line: Me, out in the wild at the hardware store was certainly not my finest look.