Tagline: At a Fourth of July parade, Jenny is stunned to see Nick again--but she's even more surprised by the fireworks that spark between them.
Observations: OMG! Funniest thing. I started reading the story and I knew I'd read it before. I was like, "Did Woman's World reprint a story??? What a huge gaff!" Then I looked at the author's name and remembered I edited this story! A month and a half ago, Karen notified me that the story we'd worked on together got sold and my aging brain didn't remember until now. <sigh>
Anyway, so excited to read the finished version!
Right away I can see an adjustment where Karen clarified the setting for us. I love the whinnying horses. That small detail really puts me there in the moment. In fact, she really did such a good job of setting the scene for the Fourth of July with so many details.
This story is also unusual because get three breaks in the action: when the parade starts, after the parade when they go to get burgers, and finally when Jenny goes home before meeting Nick for fireworks. And the Kiss! Those are few and far between for Woman's World as well, but notice how sweet and fleeting it is.
I still love the idea of them finding one of the dimes they'd hidden. And at the end of the story, we get another fantastic description...
They slowly swayed to the soothing drone of the crickets and the occasional bursts of far-off fireworks. The air smelled like summer and the sweet aroma of freshly cut hay from the nearby fields.
I mean, come on. You're there, right?
Awesome story. So proud of Karen!!
If you are interested in having me work on a story with you, here's a link to everything you need to know.
Photo by Steren Giannini via Flickr CC license
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