Tag A Heart

by Rosemary Hayes from the December 3, 2018 issue

Tagline: After years of searching online for her long-lost love, Lauren Bird has given up on ever seeing him again...until an unexpected name shows up on a tag at her local Christmas tree farm, sparking new hope.

Observations: Wow, that was an unusually long tagline.

I liked this story. Nothing bothered me as I read, but I did find myself wondering about this part:

Finally, the day arrived when Lauren could pick up their tree...

My family goes to a nursery where the trees are already cut, so I'm unfamiliar with tree farms. Is it commonplace to choose a tree and then have to go back to the farm to cut it down?

Photo credit: Justin Russell via Flickr cc license

Bright New Beginnings

by Debbie Noone from the November 19, 2018 issue

Tagline: When an old flame walks back into Erin's life, she refuses to fall for him again...until his surprising plea melts her heart.

Observations: I have a ton of stuff to do today, so I'm going to do another Stream-of-Consciousness analysis.

Erin March...I'm immediately reminded of the March sisters of Little Women, for some reason, which gives me an idea of writing stories for Woman's World with heroines named after the March sisters. Yeah, my brain is weird.

Gertie smiled, fluttering out from behind the front desk of her yarn shop like a spooked starling.

I really don't know how starlings move, but I can imagine. I always appreciate a good simile in a Woman's World story.

OMG. I love the idea of a yarn shop - even though I am a failed knitter from way back - but when Gertie also holds an Ugly Sweater contest? LOL.

Well, I really should have known it was a second-chance story because of the tagline, but for some reason I was still as surprised as Erin. LOL

Erin plastered on her brightest smile a she pretended not to recognize him.

Again, LOL. I really identified with Erin because I have been in the grocery store and seen someone I didn't really want to talk to for whatever reason and pretended not to see them.

So, it occurs to me that this story has what storytellers tout as a key element of fiction writing - conflict. Erin doesn't like Jake at all, so they are at odds right from the beginning. This can make it "easy" to write the story because "all" you need to do is show her starting to like/forgive him bit by bit.

I've read two thirds of the story now and see that Erin doesn't actually start to like him. More like she remembers how much she liked him before, which isn't quite the same thing. But it works in this story.

Oh, plot twist and more conflict! Enter Daisy, the girl Erin suspected Jake had a crush on, back in the day. I love it.

"I knew the two of you would hook-up if you moved back!"

FYI, my sons (early twenties) have schooled me on the current meaning of hook-up and that I should be super careful about using it. Apparently, this generation equates a hook-up with meaningless sex.

Ah. Daisy isn't the "bad guy" after all. That was resolved quickly, but then it had to because these stories are so short!

Okay, I've finished the story. She forgives him... Honestly, I'm not feeling it. He was scared of the depth of his feelings. I can see how that would happen, but his apology didn't move me. It felt rushed to me.

Photo credit: Casey Fiesler via Flickr CC license

Reservation For Two

by Stephanie Dees from the November 26, 2018 issue

Tagline: After becoming an empty nester, Roberta is overcome with loneliness...until she finds a new love in the most unexpected place!

Observations: It's always really difficult for me when a published Woman's World story doesn't work for me. The editors can just ignore stories, whereas I need to analyze them here on the blog whether I like them or not.

Obviously, I start reading with an open mind and as I read, if something good stands out, I mentally make a note. (Sometimes I even write on the page.) Conversely, if I see something that bothers me, I note that as well.

With this story about a third of the way in, the bothersome things (and even some things didn't make sense) were starting to add up. I'll list them here, along with the parts I liked. Unfortunately, there were more negatives than positives.

Nice bits

1. "...her real home had turned quiet and lonely, feeling more like a sieve through which her life was seeping..." I really liked this part. Very poignant and descriptive. You really felt something for Roberta and what she's going through.

2. I liked how Mickey said, "I figured maybe we'd give three square meals a day a try. You know, where I'm not the only one cooking them." LOL. Very cute.

3. I liked the idea of him getting the cruise tickets for the two of them. I might have made sure the reader knew he got separate cabins. LOL

Bothersome bits

1. Second paragraph - she was heading back to her office so she could help field the first wave of lumberjack breakfasts? How is she going to help from her office?

2. I wasn't crazy about the slight melodrama of her state of mind in this sentence:

Roberta was full of pride and joy, but also felt a loss so strong that she wondered if she'd ever be able to use the word "bright" to describe her own future again.

Then I realized this ties into the last line of the story. Yeah. This technique can work well to bring the story full circle, but I think this could have used some finessing. 

3. I think colons have their place, but two in one story seems odd and when I saw the second one, I was pulled out of the story. 

4. This paragraph is kind of a grammatical mess. It has two sentence fragments and the way it's written, Roberta is her own best friend. I also winced at his head being full of curls. "Full" isn't the word I would choose, but that's getting really picky. 

Mickey: her ruggedly handsome partner-in-crime at the Darling. With his head full of chestnut-brown curls shot through with gray, and a lazy warm smile. He always looked out for Roberta--the best friend she'd never known she needed.

5. When their fingers brush and she feels a "jolt of excitement," it seemed to come out of the blue. Again, maybe the word choice wasn't quite right. Or maybe I wasn't prepared as a reader for this level of emotion at the wayward touch.

6. Free? To do what? To spend weekends walking alone on the beach or wandering around on her own?

Walking and wandering are too similar. Better to choose some other example of her solitary life.

7. He tilted his head as her heart hammered out toward him. 

Another word choice thing. I'm fine with her heart hammering, but how does it hammer out toward him?

8. Twice in the story a character "sang" his/her dialogue. I was fine with once, but like the colons, twice was too much.

9. Roberta smiled widely as she jumped up to hug him. 

When did she sit down? I went back and the last mention we have of her physical location was "she headed back to her office."

10. Why did he choose a cruise that was over Christmas? Isn't she going to spend the holidays with her daughters?

So, yeah, this story didn't work for me and I feel really bad about it. I hate to take the joy out of the author's accomplishment by so heavily criticizing it, but this is only my opinion. I also really hate James Patterson's style of writing, and he's one of the most popular novelists alive today, so take what I've said here with a grain of salt.

Photo credit: Kabacchi via Flickr CC license

Bit of Sugar and Spice

by Diane Crawford from the November 12, 2018 issue

Tagline: After her divorce, Jane worried she faced a lifetime of lonely nights, until Steve's bright smile lit up her heart with new hope.

Observations: I am going to do a stream-of-consciousness analysis this week, which means, I read the story and type thoughts and observations as I go.

I find myself wondering why she wants pumpkins after Halloween and for what purpose, but I peeked to see who the author was, and it's Diane Crawford, an author who has sold quite a few stories to Woman's World. So, I assume my question will be answered eventually.

I adore this vivid description:

As she opened the door, taking a moment to watch the golden sunlight cresting over the cornfield just beyond her, a tall handsome man with gray-streaked hair emerged from the stalks like a vision.

What a beautiful image. As you know, Woman's World stories are only 800 words long, so sometimes you have to skimp on imagery, but Crawford gives us a wonderful image and a character's physical description in one succinct sentence.

And here she skillfully summarizes the heroine's backstory in one sentence:

Since she'd gotten divorced three years earlier, the mornings had become a respite from an endless stream of lonely nights.

She needs fifteen pumpkins? What on earth for? I'm even more intrigued.

Ah, she teaches at the community center, which is exactly the type of good-citizen profession one might expect from a character in a Woman's World romance.

"Budgeting Makes Cents" - clever name for the class!

Aha! Mystery solved. She's teaching her students to make pumpkin bread from real pumpkins.

Here's a bit I'd like to highlight...

On the way home, Jane's stomach fluttered nonstop. It had been years since a man had flirted with her...or since she'd been interested in a man at all. She resolved to return to the farm after class, to thank Steve and Eric with some fresh loaves of pumpkin bread...or, if she was being honest with herself, just to see Steve again.

This paragraph is pivotal in showing Jane's character arc. This is where she makes the realization that she's truly ready to move on past her divorce. Character arcs aren't mandatory in these romance stories, but I believe they add some emotional heft and make the stories feel more complete and satisfying.

In the last paragraph I noticed a little fire theme. The only word that didn't fit in was "bloom."

"I'd love to," Jane said, feeling a warmth bloom in her chest. Suddenly, he took her hand in his. And as his strong fingers closed around hers, Jane felt a new spark of hope blaze in her heart.

Photo Credit via Flickr CC License: Martin Brigden

Parking Spot Bandit

by Tamara Shaffer from the November 5, 2018 issue

Tagline: After her divorce, Sherry wasn't sure she'd ever find love again...until a parking spot poacher named Phillip stole his way into her heart!

Observations: As I read this story, I was a little surprised that Woman's World approved of Sherry's tantrum. That was pretty in-your-face behavior that, as an author, I may not have risked. However, the rest of the story shows her feeling remorseful and if you think about it, that's how we all grow as people, right? We make mistakes. We do our best to make up for them. It's a good life lesson and a romance story rolled into one! :)

Something else I wanted to point out...we've all had this happen. Someone snags the parking spot we had our eye on. This is actually a great way to come up with story ideas. Just look at what happened during your day. Really! If you can find the type of occurrence that happens to everyone and build a story around it, you can be certain the story will resonate with readers on that level (including the editors). They'll read it and think, "That happens to me all the time," and just like that, they've made a personal connection with your story.

Photo credit: Nicole Danielson via Flickr CC license.

A Sweet Fortune

by Amy Andrews from the October 29, 2018 issue

Tagline: When a fortune cookie foretold that Callie would meet the man of her dreams on Halloween, she spent years secretly hoping the prediction would come true. But just when she'd given up on ever finding love, she meets a handsome stranger...on All Hallow's Eve. Could he finally be the one?

Observations: Wow. LONGEST TAGLINE EVER. LOL It was like a full paragraph. They're really taking advantage of the double page spread. :)

I actually got a chill at the end of this story, something I wasn't expecting. It was a little eerie, but what to you expect from a Halloween story, right?

Again, for a Harlequin Woman's World story, I think this is indistinguishable from the norm we're used to seeing. Maybe the editorial staff and Harlequin had a meeting or are communicating more. Whatever they're doing, it's making the "5-minute romance" experience more consistent for the reader.

Regarding this story in particular, I liked the "coincidence" of the hero dressing as the thing that the heroine is afraid of. I also liked that he was Itsy Bitsy, instead of a scary spider. Again, talking about characterization, the fact that this man isn't afraid to channel his inner child or about being "manly," shows that he's real life romance material--at least the type of romance material Woman's World story readers are looking for. No tortured, alphas here. No sirree.

Photo credit: Andrew Malone via Flickr CC license

A Sweet Surprise

by Rosemary Hayes from the October 22, 2018 issue

Tagline: Haunted by a past relationship, Laura is afraid she'll never fall in love again...until Joel shows up on her doorstep Halloween night and makes a heartfelt confession.

Observations: Who can resist such a sweet story of a romance that was so long in the making? You can't help but admire the heroine for not wanting to come between her brother and his best friend. That's the type of characterization that works well in a Woman's World story. The editors like to be shown good, positive character traits. In my opinion, this is because we're not only telling romance stories, we're also showing people at their best, to counter all the negativity we see around us these days. Think of our stories as a weekly prescription of happy and keep that in mind as you're writing your own stories.

Photo credit: Scott McLeod via Flickr CC license

Hearts Lost and Found

by Jill Weatherholt from the October 15, 2018 issue

Tagline: Just when Charles fears he'll never be able to fall in love again, he meets Melanie in an unlikely place...and she changes everything.

Observations: Well, this was a Harlequin story and very well done. I may start regularly analyzing them. I didn't even realize it was an HQ story until I saw the book cover at the end. I like that it's not so "in your face."

Unfortunately, that means less stories for us freelancers, or perhaps more opportunity to sell to Harlequin, if they like the type of Woman's World stories we write...? Glass half full and so on.

So I really cannot find anything in this story that does not jibe with the regular Woman's World stories. It has the right tone, the right kind of plot, the touch of nostalgia/tradition that we have come to associate with the magazine. Even the ending was spot on.

I did laugh at this line:

"Thank you both for rescuing me," she said, her green eyes sparkling up at Charles. "I probably would have gotten lost in there and ended up looking like one of the scarecrows..."

LMAO.

Photo credit: Cynthia Collins via Flickr CC license.

A Dream Come True

by Mary Jo Young from the October 8, 2018 issue

Tagline: Katherine didn't have time for love, but when Don walked into her life, she realized she had seen his blue eyes before...in her dreams!

Observations: First a couple of general observations about the layout of the story. THERE'S A HOT GUY PIC! Holy moly, people. It's not a puppy or a kitten or a latte with a foam heart. Is this a trend? We shall see. Also, the print is bigger now, and I wonder if this is a nod to a readership who isn't getting any younger. I certainly had an easier time reading it. Also, it made the story look much longer.

Overall, very cute story and well written. That was a neat twist that they'd actually met when they were kids, even if Katie was the only one who actually realized it.

However, at the beginning of the story, I noticed something I was taught to avoid, something I call, "As you know, Bob." It's the backstory presented in conversation, but it's information that both characters already know. Clearly, Liz knows about Katherine's recurring dream because she says, "Did he actually say anything this time?" It's no big deal. Obviously the editors had no problem with it, but if it had been my story, I'd have done the recap of her dream as part of the narrative and not dialogue. Other than that, no complaints!

Photo credit: David Goerhing via Flickr CC license

Love During Visiting Hours

by Andrea Bolter from the October 1, 2018 issue

Harlequin Story

Tagline: Seven years after Carla and Luke parted ways, they bump into each other in the most unlikely of places...and the old flames feel a new spark!

Observations: I decided to go ahead and analyze this one, even though it's a Harlequin story. Ms. Bolder did such a great job, I couldn't tell until the end that it wasn't a freelancer's story.

All throughout reading this story, I kept thinking about that movie The Bucket List with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson, about two old codgers who have to share a hospital room. This was a set-up I haven't seen before in years and years of looking at Woman's World stories.

Just help me out here...when they say cheese sandwich, is that a grilled cheese sandwich? Because if so, yum. If they mean a cold cheese sandwich, yuck. LOL

Photo by: Kitchen Life of a Navy Wife (Flickr creative commons license)

Suds and Sparks

by Kathy L. Matisko from the September 24, 2018 issue

Tagline: When Julie met Cole, it was awash with possibility!

Kate's completely subjective rating: 8

Observations: This story seems simple, but there's a lot of craft going on inside it. I'm going to just laundry-list (LOL at the pun) what I noticed.

The description of Cole was extremely sparse. It was just five words.

Tall. Trim. Tousled dark hair.

It wasn't even a complete sentence, which is great because these stories are so short, you have to cut wherever you can.

You have a meet-cute, in which he saves her from a grocery cart collision.

Matisko revealed the characters' single status in a clever way with that quilt and the convo.

The ending referred back to Julie's romance-reading grandmother, which was a detail that makes the story nice and tight.

Photo credit: liz west via Flickr creative commons license.

Home at Last

by Diane Crawford from the September 17, 2018 issue

Tagline: When Jenna moved back to her hometown, she wasn't looking for romance--but then...

Observations: I often talk about having a character learn a small lesson or overcome an obstacle, even in these short 800 word stories. However, this is not a mandatory thing and this week's story is a good example of a heroine who has no character arc. She's perfect the way she is. You may have heard the terms "character driven" or "plot driven." This story was definitely plot driven.

If you omit a character arc, you can concentrate solely on the romance--in this case, a second-chance romance. Also note the nostalgic feel of the story. Small towns are inherently nostalgic, recalling that Norman Rockwellian atmosphere. For instance, when she mentioned concerts in the park, I immediately pictured a park with a big white gazebo, like in the movie Groundhog Day. You picture a lifestyle that is relaxed and more focused on the Good Things in Life.

This is what Woman's World readers want to read about because that's the focus of the entire magazine. Everything in the publication is geared toward helping women focus on the simple things, relaxing, being healthy, being happy. All things positive. So keep that in mind when writing your stories.

Photo credit: MCTV Dave via Flickr creative commons license

A Season of Change

by Tina Radcliffe from the September 3, 2018 issue

Tagline: Leslie was suffering from an empty nest, but Sam filled her heart with a new kind of joy.

Observations: This was an adorable story. I, myself, might be facing an empty nest soon. My own two kids are finally taking steps to move out together. I'm excited to have a room to myself and to get rid of some furniture we'd been holding onto in the hopes they'd take it with them, but I will miss seeing them everyday, not to mention the fact that I will once again be doing all the dishes. LOL

It's been a while since I talked about the three-act structure and how it applies even to very short stories like these. If you look back, most stories have a three act structure. This story, however, only has two. In the first act, we meet Leslie and see her in her "ordinary world," a term that comes from Christopher Vogler's A Writer's Journey, a book I highly recommend for fiction writers. We find out all the pertinent information about her--she's single, she has two grown daughters who just went away to college together, she has a crush on Sam the neighbor.

The second act begins the moment Sam appears. This is where we see the two characters connecting in a meaningful way. (Honestly, I wish I had a Sam who lived next door. I have quite a few home improvement projects I'd like to have done, but my dh is not very handy around the house.)

Another thing I notice--and perhaps it's because I am about to become an empty-nester--is that Leslie is very easy to identify with. When you're creating characters for Woman's World, you want to make them likeable. You want to give them traits or situations that the readers and the characters have in common. And on the pages of Woman's World, you also want to make those female characters strong. You'll never see any doormat women in Woman's World stories. No. They're women who set goals, who take action, who are willing to try new things.

Photo credit: Liz West via Flickr cc license

A Pair of Lovebirds

by Jill Weatherholt from the August 27, 2018 issue

Tagline: Myrna wasn't thinking about romance...until she met Jim!

Observations: Very cute story. I happen to adore hummingbirds. I have three feeding stations and have been battling ants this summer. They love the nectar as much as the birds to. I also lost a feeder to my gardener, who knocked it over while mowing the lawn, causing it to break. As a hummingbird aficionado, I also know that you should never buy the red dyed nectar. The dye damages the eggs. It's better (and much cheaper to make the nectar yourself. It's just one part sugar to four parts water.)

I admit I did not see Jim's third appearance as the one-man nursery crew coming. I was expecting her to go back to the store or something.

I think the ending was very well done.

She was thrilled that her new hummingbird sanctuary had not only attracted the birds but also a very special man.

Photo by C. Watts via Flicker CC license

The Lucky Penny

by Shelley Cooper from the August 6, 2018 issue

Tagline: Years ago, Lindsay tossed a penny in a fountain and wished for her Prince Charming...would it ever come true?

Observations: The most intriguing, different part of the story, for me, was when Lindsay realized her error. I found myself wondering what she was searching for in the fountain. That little mystery kept me reading. (Not that I would have stopped reading, because, you know, I have a blog I have to maintain. LOL)

When we find out the mystery, it's so touching...

"I'm not wading, officer." Then she told him about the coin her father had given her on her first day of school. A coin that he'd told her would always keep her safe. A coin she carried in his memory. A coin she'd mistakenly given to one of her nieces.

This story also made me chuckle out loud...

"My father taught me to always indulge the elderly and the infirm."

If you're a good student of Woman's World stories, you probably caught that little nod to independent women which was also the "black moment."

"Can I treat you to an ice cream?"

"No," she replied. A thrill shot through her at his obvious disappointment. "But I'd like it very much if you'd let me treat you."

Photo by Sam Howzit, via Flickr CC license

So Much In Common

by Jenny Welsh from the August 20, 2018 issue

Tagline: Sarah and Cody were perfect for each other, but it took the matchmaker downstairs to help them see it!

Observations: Another adorable story! I loved the rooftop setting. (Coincidentally, the story I'm publishing next has a scene on a rooftop!) The piled up coincidences were funny and not the least bit annoying.

You'll notice that the hero and heroine don't get much on-page time together, which is unusual and a little counter to the advice I usually give you, which is to actively show them connecting. This way the reader believes they have a real chance to fall in love. Often, we've seen the couple on a date or having spent some time together. We end up feeling confident they'll continue to see each other.

In this story, you only see them together for about one third of the story. In this case, the "happy for now" ending ends a little sooner than many Woman's World stories and we end up feeling confident they'll have a conversation. LOL But it still works.

Photo by Eddie Welker (Flickr CC license)

Teacher's Pet

Photo by Magic Madzik (Flickr cc license)

by Diane Crawford from the July 23, 2018 issue

Tagline: When Abby attended a former teacher's birthday party, she didn't realize it could lead to romance...

Observations: Adorable story. Also, a setting/premise I don't remember seeing before - a former teacher's birthday party. I saw the chocolate bar gift coming, but it didn't diminish the delight I felt when I saw my prediction come true.

Did you notice the story had a villain? LOL It's kind of a stretch to call Dean a villain, but in Steve's mind, Dean was definitely a minor threat to his courtship of Abby.

Romance by Accident

Photo Credit: Rusty Clark (Flickr cc license)

by Ann M. Janis from the July 30, 2018 issue

Tagline: Amy wasn't looking for romance, but her improbable meeting with Jim was a nice surprise!

Observations: I think I'm going to do a stream-of-consciousness analysis today, which means I type what comes into my head as I'm reading.

First paragraph - I immediately sympathize with Amy and her feelings about the family reunion. Who among us has not ever felt like we weren't going anywhere with our lives and worried that people were judging us for our lack of forward motion? This kind of thing establishes a bond with the reader right away. They think, "I've felt like that too. I want to keep reading so I can see if things turn out all right for her." And the reader, after reading that Amy ends up happy, feels more optimistic about her own life, or at least feels happy for Amy.

After the crash - Hm. That guy seemed very cool and collected for someone who could very likely get chewed out.

The flowers were a nice touch.

"I was mesmerized by the hard hat's blue eyes." - Hats don't have eyes.

Thursday she receives the check - I am admiring Jim Stevens's persistence. LOL

I'm surprised at her suggestion of a picnic and super surprised about the reunion because I totally forgot the story started with that! Awesome.

Okay, I just got to the part where Jim explains to Amy how his family is sparse and widely scattered and that nailed it. This is what you should try to strive for in a Woman's World story. You tell a romance, yes. That's obvious. What's not as obvious is that you should try to show how a character grows just a little and learns a small (or even big) lesson about herself/himself or life in general.

Think about what the story would have been without that part where Amy realizes how lucky she is that she has this caring but sometimes annoying family. It would have been a cute tale about a meet cute and a construction guy who isn't afraid to go after what he wants. But with the realization, it becomes so much richer, plus it strengthens the two characters' relationship and brings them closer.

Announcements from Patricia Gaddis

So, Patricia asked me to pass on some information.

Stephanie Saible has retired and has been replaced by Carol Brooks. According to Patricia, Carol is a lovely person and loves the fiction in Woman's World. So everyone should just carry on as before unless otherwise noted. 

The second announcement is that her book, "Escape to the Biltmore" is available on Amazon and soon in hardcover. She has this to say about it:

"The story is loosely based on the life of my great grandmother who practiced medicine in 1895 and spent much of her time helping others. She was also friends with the Vanderbilts who owned the Biltmore House in Asheville. I am looking for people to review my book on Amazon, so anyone willing to participate will be greatly appreciated. Please, no less than 3 stars."

Back in the Game

by Mary Ann Joyce from the July 9, 2018 issue

Photo: Hakan Dahlstrom (Flickr CC license)

Tagline: Ava had a crush on the cute guy at the gym...but would he ever notice her?

Observations: Ha! This was a story that used the title at the end successfully. When you do this, it has to make sense and not feel contrived. I thought the idea of physical therapy as a vehicle for a first meet was novel and his attempt to impersonate a jail bird was funny.

Pro tip: The humor in Woman's World stories is often slightly goofy like that. It's almost never sarcastic. It usually shows one or both of the main characters to be affably adorable.

Fireworks and Love

by Tina Radcliffe from the July 2, 2018 issue

Tagline: Kate thought the honeymoon was long over...then Jack gave her a surprise.

Photo: Jim, the Photographer (Flickr CC license)

Observations: I'm still having to get used to the thicker paper. More than once as I was thumbing through this issue, I thought I had two pages stuck together. LOL

Okay, I LOVED this story! Probably because it hits pretty close to home. My excuse for not prettying myself up anymore is because I had gained so much weight that I didn't like buying clothes, I didn't like trying to make myself look good because what was the point? However because of a new program I'm on, I've lost 17 pounds and I feel so great. TMI: I have shorts that I can pull off without unfastening. LOL Anyway, my point is, I could identify with a couple who don't go out of their way like they used to when they were first in love.

It's hard to write these types of stories and not have the wife or husband appear catty or disgruntled or complaining. Tina Radcliffe did this really well. She also showed both characters taking action, which is how it should be in a marriage. :)

Man's Best Friend

by Amy Michaels from the June 18, 2018 issue

Photo: Jim Leary (Flickr CC license)

Tagline: Jeff and his beagle admired their neighbor...little did they know that the feeling was mutual!

Observations: Happy Independence Day, people! I hope you enjoy your holiday.

Before I get started, I wanted to also celebrate the fact that Woman's World is using thicker paper! Finally! I think too thin paper was why some of my issues were going missing. Either the entire cover or the part with the address label was getting eaten by the postal machines. I'm excited.

This was an adorable story! I was smiling throughout as I read it. I think part of it might be because it was written in first person, from Jeff's point of view. There was so much personality in the narrative.

My favorite line was, "Seriously, Oz?" LOL

The only slightly clunky thing was that man's best friend line at the end. It didn't seem natural for him to say that, so to me, it felt like they were trying to tie in the title but not very successfully.

On Track for Love

by Jody Lebel from the June 11, 2018 issue

Tagline: Nora wasn't looking for love, but she found it on a romantic train ride...

Photo credit: Stanley Wood (Flickr CC license)

Observations: It's so good to see a story from my friend, Jody. I thought this was a charming story. It's difficult to construct a plot in which the couple meet while traveling because, in order for the romance to continue, they need to spend more time together--difficult to do if you live in different cities.

It was interesting to see a sort of "villain" in the story. If you're a regular reader of the Woman's World romances, you knew that Colette was not a serious contender. I think Jody did a good job of showing Nora analyzing the other woman without seeming catty.

Notice the moment when their hands touch near the beginning of the story. I thought that was a lovely snapshot in time. It also showed Ken being a gentleman.

The Setup

Photo credit: Josh Dionne (Flickr cc license)

by Anna Jo Christopher from the June 4, 2018 issue

Tagline: Cassie wasn't looking for love...but there was something special about Ben!

Observations: This week we had a matchmaker story about a game night. I love game nights! I recently went to visit my brother in Texas and we played games almost non-stop. But I digress.

I didn't see anything in particular I wanted to point out except for the fact that the suspenseful black moment happened in the middle of the story and not at the end. Did you notice it? It's when the mystery man is 20 minutes late. It's odd how in these short stories, you can get away with things you wouldn't normally be able to in a novella or novel.

Catch of the Day

Photo credit: Fuzzy Gerdes (Flickr CC license)

by Diane Crawford from the May 28, 2018 issue

Tagline: Paul was fishing for his dinner...then he caught Lynne!

Observations: Obviously, this story stood out a bit for being in the male, first person point of view. It was refreshing! It was also another example of a story that goes against my oft offered advice to give the couple more screen time together. This story mainly occurred in Paul's head. We get a very detailed picture of who this man is and we end up liking him.

I liked the surprise of Lynne being the one in the hat, and the moment he spotted the red cap, I knew it was her. Also I wanted you to notice at one point in the story, Paul wondered at the scarcity of women who liked the outdoors. Sure enough, he finds one right under his nose. Crawford didn't feel the need to repeat this info in a sentence like, "Paul knew he and Lynne would spend many a day in the sunshine and fresh air." It wasn't necessary. The reader already knows this is a good match.

Night Owls

by Nell Musolf from the May 21, 2018 issue

Photo credit: Alex Antonio (Flicker CC)

Tagline: Night shifts were really boring...that is, until Mark ran into Susan!

Observations: I think I can safely say that it's never a bad idea to show the hero and heroine of your story having something in common. In this case, it was the fact that they both work nights.

I wanted to point out something I haven't mentioned in a while. I always think it's a good idea to show your heroine making smart choices as a single woman. If you're a woman, jogging at night is probably not the wisest choice, especially if you keep to a predictable schedule. But Susan takes her dog with her, which shows she's a smart cookie. No one wants to read about a TSTL (too stupid to live) character.

The Prom Date

by Elizabeth Palmer, from the May 14, 2018 issue

Tagline: Jude regretted not going with Ryan to her high school prom. Now, 25 years later, she was given a second chance!

Observations: I enjoyed the black moment when you think all is lost...when she has to decline is invitation to coffee. We know that Ryan was shy as a teen, so we readers wonder if he's still painfully shy and not likely to work up the courage to ask her again. Including a black moment in these stories, even though they're only 800 words long, is something I recommend. It's not necessary, because I see plenty of Woman's World romances published that do not have a black moment, but I like to add them whenever I can.

What set this story apart was that secret compartment. That compartment served the story in a couple of ways I want to talk about.

First, it created a sense of mystery and made us wonder if there was one and if so, what was inside. Palmer nailed it when she made it a sentimental item and not a bunch of cash, which is kind of what I thought it might be. Woman's World loves sentimental stuff like finding a missing cameo that belongs to one's beloved late grandmother. Second, this cameo and the fact that she wore it to the prom allowed Palmer to bring the prom up into the conversation. This way the characters could clear up the misunderstanding from so many years ago and make a fresh start.

Putting the Pieces Together by Rosemary Hayes

Photo: James Petts

from the May 7, 2018 issue

Tagline: Emma and Joel had broken up...but was it really over?

Observations: This was a terrific story and unusual in that it was about a couple who were on the rocks. Those stories are so much harder to write and it's always refreshing to see them. (I'll bet Patricia is always happy to see a break from the norm too.)

This story is an example of why Rosemary Hayes's stories appear so often. It's just so tight. There's a part in the guidelines which says, "Every sentence, paragraph, and scene of the story should deliver more information about your characters and their situation and/or briskly advance the storyline." This story does this beautifully.

The beginning seems like just a package delivery, but it deftly shows Emma is recently single, that she still loves her ex, that she's got a mother who needs her.

Then we find out what the package is, we find out more about her and Joel's "friendship," we also find out about how they met at a game/puzzle store. See how tightly this is plotted?

Of course, we readers know the puzzle is Joel reaching out to Emma, but that makes it all the more fun to see her figuring it out. It's funny how I don't even "meet" Joel until the end of the story, but when he does make an appearance, I already love him! This is so contrary to the advice I usually give, stating the couple need on-the-page time to show their connection. In this story, the connection is taken for granted because they have a history together already.

As expected, the puzzle is a proposal and it's perfect. What a great story.

A Romance With Class by Amy Michaels

Photo: John Lodder via Flickr CC License

from the April 30, 2018 issue

Tagline: Liz's literature class focused on classic romances, but could a more intriguing plot be unfolding off the page?

Observations: Loved this story!! I liked the romantic literature focus of the class. I really liked the ending.

Notice there were two matchmakers in the story, rather than the usual one.

Going back and re-reading, I saw this and it made me laugh:

"Did you notice that our reading list is all classic romantic literature? I have it on good authority that our instructor is quite the romantic," Rick said.

We find out later that the instructor is Rick's uncle. LOL

Growing Love by Jenny Welsh

Photo by Ed Bierman (Flickr CC license)

from the April 23, 2018 issue

Tagline: When Harry offers to build a garden for Ellen, can more than just flowers grow?

Observations: This story was so different. I can't recall seeing very many friends-to-lovers stories in Woman's World. I thought this really worked.

I really liked her moment of clarity. I liked that she was ready to move forward and take action.

The story didn't wow me, but it was good.

Falling for Jeff by Nell Musolf

Photo by Molly via Flickr Creative Commons License

Tagline: Janet thought she would never find love again...until she accidentally met Jeff!

Observations: Let's talk about setting today. Woman's World stories very often occur in everyday settings, like in this case--the grocery store. This is why when you're searching for ideas for stories, you can often look at what's going on in your own ordinary life to get ideas.

What did you do today? Went grocery store shopping maybe. Got gas. Picked the kids up from school. Bought spackle and paint to fix a ding in the wall. Those things could all be kernels for a story. Everyday settings like the grocery store, the gas station, the hardware store, etc. make the stories more accessible for the readership. They can identify more with the story and the characters because they are so much like themselves. This is in contrast to stories in which the reader lives vicariously and therefore wants to experience something more adventurous, exciting, dangerous.

You could easily build an entire story just by starting with a common, everyday setting. You could pick a setting and then think of a small problem or goal the main character has or needs to solve.

Sample settings and problems/goals for them:

Dry cleaners - The character lost a lot of weight and needs their clothes altered. (A lot of dry cleaners in my area have alterations included as part of their services) They have a wedding to attend but the clothes they were going to wear have a big stain.

Movie theater - The character thinks they lost their phone at the movies the night before. The character got two movie tickets as a gift and doesn't want to go alone, or, conversely, is trying to adjust to life without their spouse or ex and meets someone there.

Mall - There's fender bender in the parking lot. The person can't find their car in the parking garage. The person left a bag on the roof of their car, it falls off, and spills the contents all over.

Corner coffee shop - The customer picks up someone else's drink by accident. The person doesn't know what to order. The person is trying to find a new drink because their doctor just told them no caffeine.

Pharmacy - Sprained finger, needs a splint. Looking for a greeting card of some kind. Buying all the leftover Easter/Valentine's Day/Halloween candy on sale.

See what I mean? I just dashed these off in the last ten minutes.

However, there are plenty of Woman's World stories published that do NOT have commonplace settings. So don't feel you're limited. There are just as many stories that occur at places you don't go once every one or two weeks, like the arboretum, the museum, a concert, the beach, a blueberry farm, a cooking class, and so on.

Pro tip: Have a designated place for keeping these kinds of brainstorming ideas so you can refer to them when you need them.

The Colors of Love by Wendy Hobday Haugh

From the April 2, 2018 issue

Tagline: Jessie had just moved into a  new home and needed someone to help her with the painting...

Observations: I loved this story. On the surface, it was your typical "man to the rescue" story with a little "matchmaker" thrown in for good measure. I really love when stories span more than a day. This one went on for weeks as they got to know each other over several dinners. I would like to have seen a bit more about those dinners, but didn't mind the lack because the black moment was so good.

If you're new to the blog, let me explain black moments to you. There comes a time in every book, movie or story that things look very bleak. In romances, you think they couple will never get their Happily Ever After.

In this story, I found the black moment to be particularly sad. It was this sentence that did it.

Two days later, she arrived home to find the papers gone and her spare house key sitting there.

What an image, right? How appropriate that the key is sitting there all by itself, just like Jessie is. I really felt her disappointment keenly. If you can make your reader feel something the way Haugh did in that black moment, then the happy ending will be that much happier.

I also liked the surprise that he wasn't actually a house painter. I had an inkling something was odd when Dwayne had said he wasn't sure he was the right guy for the job. I also thought he might end up painting a trompe-l'oeil mural directly on the wall, exposing a talent he didn't know he'd had, but the way Haugh did it was just as good.

Great story!

Photo credit: Ewen Roberts via Flickr CC license

Bunny Kisses by Ann M. Janis

from the March 26, 2018 issue

Tagline: Could Sean be sweet on more than just Kate's cookies?

Observations: This was a super cute story. Having been to many a fundraiser and festival in my time, this evoked a lot of the same optimism I remember as a teacher and as a parent.

I did think the milk chocolate treat for a tail on the cookies made for a weird image. I know bunnies can be brown, but these cookies were pastel, so the brown tail seemed like an odd choice.

I'd also like to issue a blanket commendation to all the uber-dedicated aunts and uncles of Woman's World stories! Again, in my experience as a teacher and parent, it was work to just get parents to attend these types of events, let alone uncles and aunts. LOL But we authors have artistic license and we often need to use it!

I adored the ending:

He smiled, and her heart did a little bunny hop.

An Irresistible Treasure by Marti Attoun

From the March 12, 2018 issue

Tagline: Shannon didn't expect to find romance in a thrift shop...but Gabe was a treasure she couldn't resist!

Observations: I haven't done a stream-of-consciousness critique in a while and I'm a bit behind with the stories, so here goes...

1. I love clownfish! I've loved them even before Finding Nemo came out. They're so adorable and the way they "make friends" with anemones to protect themselves is amazing.

2. I can totally picture Shannon's apartment. My MIL's house was much like this--a collection of oddball items and antique furniture that was so her.

3. LOL "unique second-hand hodgepodge"

4. "If the chicken Parm bombs, you can blame it on these guys." -- I am totally confused by this line.

5. Ah, the aunt is on vacation so the handsome nephew is filling it. This is a popular trope of Woman's World stories. However, I wonder why Shannon didn't know about this vacation. I'd think Evelyn would have notified her if she saw her every week for the aquarium upkeep. I'm thinking it was probably Evelyn playing matchmaker.

6. "I'm so thrilled that Evelyn finally got to see a real ocean again." -- Oh, that's a great loop back to the line in the beginning of the story.

7. Love this line:

"What she didn't tell me was she bought enough salt and pepper shakers at an estate sale to season the whole Midwest."

8. Cute ending, tying into the title. This is something I haven't mentioned in a while. If you're looking for a way to wrap up your story neatly, connect your title with your ending line. I'm not sure what's easier--writing the ending first and coming up with a title afterward, or vice-versa. Also, the setting of a secondhand or antique shop is a tried and true one too.

Baking Up Romance by Mary Davis

Tagline: Sara had no time for love...until she met Jim!

Observations: I can appreciate the cuteness in this story. Who doesn't love a baker? Or a male teacher? I thought the math angle was clever, but I don't have much else to say about this story. Sorry.

I wanted to mention that I see a lot of farmer's markets showing up in Woman's World. It almost seems as if the farmer's market is this year's yard sale.

P.S. I must be dumber than a fourth grader because there's no way I could do that math problem with out a pen and paper.

Photo credit: Crystal via Flickr CC License

Sunny with a Chance of Romance by Amy Michaels

Tagline: Peter offered Rachel an umbrella and a chocolate croissant...but was there a chance of romance?

Observations: First of all, this is my 500th post!!! I can't believe it. Not all 500 are story analyses, but most of them are, and I don't plan on stopping anytime in the near future.

I adored this story, maybe because I work with chocolate croissants every day! LOL

A few things I wanted to point out about this story...

There is a part in the middle that fast-forwards us through time. It's a "telling" passage, as opposed to "showing." This kind of device helps the reader feel as if the story is longer than it really is. I have to admit that when Rachel gets back in town and sees the canopy and tables, I was totally surprised. It's hard to surprise me in a Woman's World story!

Here's a line that I loved:

The girl smiled. "Oh, you must be the chocolate croissant."

LMAO. FYI, this is totally how we Starbucks baristas sometimes refer to our regular customers--by their drinks, not their names (which we sometimes don't know or can't remember).

In a Woman's World story, you can refer to physical attraction, but do it discreetly. This is how Michaels did it...

The broad smile on his face and the warmth in his eyes had her pulse racing.

That's all it takes. Just a sentence. :)

Photo credit: Joy via Flickr CC license

Missing issues

So the last issue I got was Feb 12.

I just got March 5.

I called them and they don't have any extras they can send.

Anyone able to send me the missing stories? 

The Lost Valentine by Elizabeth Palmer

from the February 12, 2018 issue

Tagline: Kathryn remembered Daniel from kindergarten, but did he remember her?

Observations: I have to admit I found myself reading on and reading on and wondering if Daniel was going to recognize her or if she was going to have to tell him. When he finally revealed that he knew who she was, the way he did it was adorable (if a teensy bit hard for me to believe.)

I thought that how the characters recognized each other was very clever. She remembered his head shaking gesture. His memory wasn't jogged until he saw her in her signature ponytail.

Woman's World magazine likes stories that tug at your heartstrings, like this one does with that long lost valentine being saved all those years. Stories with old flames in them usually have that built in. Sit down at your computer today and try to write one. Don't worry that this old flame story just appeared in the magazine and they won't want to publish another similar story so soon because it'll be a month or two before a story submitted today will appear.

Photo credit: David Rader II via the Flickr CC license

A Birthday to Remember by Elizabeth Palmer

from the February 5, 2018 issue

Tagline: Will wasn't looking for romance...and then he met Lily...

Observations: I'm in love with this story. It felt very complete and satisfying and the main reason for this is that we saw their relationship develop slowly.

They met in her classroom. He asked for the pictures and she texted them to him. They continued to text and get to know each other. They went on a date. She brought him birthday cake.

See what I mean? Because so much time had gone by and so much had happened, it seemed like a much longer story. It truly felt like we had watched their romance develop. If you ask me, this is something to strive for.

Photo credit: Liz West via the Flickr CC license.

Mini Mystery Writers

Hey, Patricia asked me to pass on a request.

"We are looking for more charming cozies where someone steals someone else's prize roses/recipe/whatever-- too many murder mysteries- making transition asap."

So, best get to your computers and start writing! :)

Cupcake Saturday by Tina Radcliffe

 from the January 18, 2018 issue

Tagline: When Drew offered to help Hanna with her cupcake business, things suddenly got sweeter...

Observations: Lovely story! We have a matchmaker tale that I didn't see coming for a full third of the story. I adored that Drew bartered his services for her cupcake business. What a great idea.

The grandma and the grandson playing Crazy Eights reminded me of when I used to play that game with my own grandma. Those are very fond memories and it made me think about me identifying more with the grandma than the heroine in this story. Which made me realize I should talk to you about your audience.

You would be smart to consider the older demographic of Woman's World readers as you're writing your stories. Here's a screenshot of some info from the Bauer Publishing website. As you can see the median age of our readers is 55.7 years old. Coincidentally, I am 55 years old. So the readership is my generation and maybe yours too. But even if it's not, you can do some research. There are websites on pop culture for the different decades. Pull stuff from there into your stories. Even in the magazine itself there's that little column on the right side that says "It Happened This Week." Look there for inspiration.

Cupcake Photo Credit: Jake Przesbo via Flickr CC license